Totally Screwed Transmutation
by xxneirxx
Summary: [Ed x Roy]AH! Edward is jelling!Can she stop Winry?... Chapter 15 out now!
1. Pay Back Time

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

Chapter 1 Pay Back Time

"Edward! Watch out!—"

_POOF!_

An hour before

"Now here's something interesting."

Roy Mustang looked up from the thick, dusty old Alchemy-opedia volume and shut it with a smile. He knew how to get back at Edward for causing him to make a fool out of himself the day before. He drew out sticks of chalk from his drawer, widened the smirk of his further, and went to prepare the TRAP for the young alchemist…

Edward was strolling back to the military building after a whole day… …of doing nothing. Yup. Nothing. Everything's back to normal – Al got his body back, no more homunculus running around (with exception of Envy – he escaped after the other homunculi were reduced to bits), _and,_ he's finally getting taller (one still has to use a measuring tape to see a difference though), he's also Colonel for now (took up position after Roy becomes Fuhrer); basically it's time of peace. _EXCEPT…_ Roy's day before wasn't really all that peaceful… Ed chuckled to himself as he revisited his thoughts of yesterday's pranks. All in all, it wasn't totally overboard, but he did make the Fuhrer mad. And besides, he was BORED. _You see, even peace has its disadvantages… _

'_Better be on my guard in case he wants revenge…' _Ed thought as he checked into the building. On his way to the Fuhrer's office, he met Lieutenant-cum-secretary Hawkeye and she saluted.

"Good day, Sir Elric."

"Good day. Is the Fuhrer in?"

"I don't think so; I saw him leave his office and never saw him walk back in. I'm not sure. You can go in and check if you like. Be careful though; he had this weird look on his face when he walked out."

Edward gave a nod. "I'll keep my eye open. Thank you, Hawkeye."

"Glad to be of service, Sir." She headed towards the Fuhrer's door.

Edward hesitated. He thought of going for a bite (he was hungry again) first before finding the Fuhrer. Besides… he didn't want to risk walking into a trap. He quietly hoped that Lieutenant Hawkeye would be fine.

… … In which, she was. Edward just turned at the point where she opened the door and had her first foot in when a hand covered her mouth and another dragged her in. She almost punched the fellow behind her but stopped when she saw who it was.

"..Sir! I didn't see you walk i—" The gloved hand moved up to cover her mouth again.

"_Shush…_ I need your help on this…"

NOW

"Whoosh, I'm full." Edward patted his slightly bulging stomach. _'Hopefully that bastard of a Fuhrer ain't up to no good, I don't wanna throw up all of that I've eaten…"_

He got up from his seat and left the canteen and made his way once again to the Fuhrer's office. Before he entered the room, though, he gave the area a thorough check. _'Hmm… Nope. No alchemy circles anywhere; not even on the door.' _He grinned. And opened the door.

"Yo, Mustang. You in here? I sure under-estimated yo—" He was about to finish his sentence as he walked further in when he tripped onto something on the floor. The warning (from Riza) came… …how should I say… …came in ONE second too late.

"Edward! Watch out!—"

_POOF!_

_Notes: Wow. I've finally posted a story for Full-Metal... In fact, this is the first time I've posted a story here! OLE! er-hem In any case, please read and review. I've got 2nd chapter written out but not typed out yet... _


	2. Realisation

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

Note to Shingo-sama – I saw your review… and I'm sad to say, this story is gonna be something like yours… so sorry for breaking your expectations, but I was already onto this idea before I went to read your story. But on a personal note, your story's damn good. I love it. And that this story of mine's gonna be slightly different. Stay with me, ok?

Additional note: this is my legend for this story -

"Abcde" - Speech (duh)

'Abcde' - Thoughts

_'ABCDE' _- sounds (blast this place, i can't use the box type brackets which was the original)

_(Abcde)_ - Side notes in the story; normal things

_((abcde))_ - my personal voice in the story. i'll try to edit the first chpt again.

* * *

Chapter 2 Realisation 

All Ed remembered was hitting the floor. _HARD._ And the sound of a transmutation. Problem was, he was too dazed to think. He gave his head a shake…which made the whole room spin. Groaning, he pushed himself up to sitting position and took in several huge gulps of air. That managed to clear the fog. And… he immediately felt something different about himself.

Before checking himself, though, he looked up at a grinning but very surprised Fuhrer.

"…I'm amazed; it actually works…" From the corner, Edward heard Riza give a tiny gasp _(which he found alarming, because Riza has always held her indifferent expression)._ He looked down at himself… …_but _could hardly tell the difference _((you guys thought he'd faint or what?))_. Roy then came up to him with a full-length mirror and pulled Ed to his feet. What he saw NOW almost made him fall right back. His face… his body…

He got transmuted into a girl!

He _((erm…'she' now, right?))_ glared at Mustang.

"_WHAT_ is the meaning of THIS!" she demanded…oh God. Even her voice was high-pitched. Roy gave a shrug. "Surely you know I'm not one who takes things lying down – I'm having me revenge, duh." He gave his famous smirk.

Edward's glare hardened. "Change me back. NOW, you bastard."

"Ok, ok… lemme get the book." He strode off.

Edward groaned inwardly. If anyone were to walk in now, he was gonna make sure that he/she doesn't recall what he did for the whole day today…

There came a _'PLOP' _of a book dropping in the reading corner. From it, Roy's voice _(although a whisper)_ was audibly heard.

"_Shit…_"

Edward rushed towards him.

"What? What's going on? You can turn me back, can't you?"

Roy gave him a blank look.

"…The book…didn't say anything…" was all he could manage to say.

Edward froze, then un-froze to pick up the dropped book. She flipped to the page Roy was reading, and as her eyes skimmed down the pages, they widened with dismay.

"No… No, No, _NOOOOOOOOO--!" _

_

* * *

Notes: Well, here's the 2nd chapter. I don't know if I should warn anyone, but this story is gonna get extremely… 'hot'… well, to me at least. (blushes like crazy) And to Shingo-sama, really really sorry for the disappointment; I have a friend who turned both Roy and Ed into animals so I didn't wanna follow that path already which was actually me first idea…so I chose this one instead… and to LeoOsaka, very sorry also. I have NO intention of pasting what Ed did to Roy…_


	3. Only I Can Take You In…

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

Notes: Er... ARGH! I can't help blushing at one of the later chapters (cause I've already got the whole plot out and is writting them soon...) because it's so...eek! scuttles away and screams when tomato stares back in face in the mirror...

Slight correction to legend: _'Abcde' _- refers to thoughts. It's different from sounds, cuz sounds are all CAPS.

* * *

Chapter 3 Only I Can Take You In…

"This-is-all-YOUR-FAULT!" Edward yelled _(more like, screamed)_ at Roy. "Now what am I gonna do? I can't face the world like this!" Ed threw a quick glance at the door behind her, hoping that no-one would pop in.

Roy had recovered from his momentary blankness, and then gave Ed a thorough look. _'Hmm… now she's shorter than ever… but…hey? Isn't that her auto-mail over there?'_ Roy walked past the glaring Ed and reached for the auto-mails on the floor. Ed was shocked; she hadn't realised they'd fallen out.

"Well, there's one good reason. You've got a perfect arm and leg back, Full Metal." He waved the metal pieces around.

Edward was still examining her new arm and leg. Though clearly feminine, it was a perfect human arm and leg. Which brought her back to reality. She was now a girl. Reaching out to grab the metal limbs back, she glared at Roy harder than ever.

"You still have some nerve… saying that this is a good thing? I can't imagine if anyone else knows about thi—" The door opened and Edward froze.

"Good evening, Fuhrer Sir!" The whole gang _(Breda, Fury, Havoc and Armstrong)_ said in unison and strode in. Major Armstrong continued, "We've brought you the paperwork for toda— Oh my goodness…" Now it was their turn to freeze.

Edward became the object of staring then. She blinked and then slowly turned to face Roy.

"Fuhrer… you have my word that I'll give you hell that you've never known…" She was then about to walk out through the door when she was stopped by Armstrong.

"Is this… who I think this is?" He asked nobody in particular. "…Full Metal?" Then pink sparkles appeared out of thin air as he embraced the shocked girl, all the while going, "Oh my goodness! So cute, so cute, so cute!"

Stunned, one-by-one the rest crowded around the now very red-faced girl. "Erm, Major? I think you better let go of me…" Armstrong blinked and grinned.

"Yup; forgot you are a girl now…"

It was Breda's turn to speak. "…How…?" It was immediately followed by the rest.

"Oh my gosh…"

"Can you turn back…?"

"What a change… Hughes would hop out of his grave just to get a photo…" _((this is Breda again by the way))_

Roy cleared his throat. They all stood at attention, handed in the report… and returned to the staring. Edward was very uncomfortable by now.

"Will you all stop with the staring! I want out; I wanna go—wait." Then her jaw dropped. "I can't go out like this! Where am I going to stay? ARGH! I can't let anymore people see me!" She dropped to her knees.

Surprisingly, the next voice heard was Riza's. "Edward… there's a page on how to turn one into a boy…" Ed immediately jumped up and went to look. She liked what she saw. Snapping her head towards Roy, she said, "Go draw out the circle in here. Now. You started this mess." Roy huffed. _'Yar right… then what the hell happened yesterday, huh?'_

---…---…---

'_POOF!'_

Everyone crowded round to see. As the smoke cleared, the top of Ed's head appeared. Then as the fog cleared to reveal the young alchemist's body, they stared again. IT DIDN'T WORK. Edward stared and stared. _'It should have worked! What went wrong?'_ She frantically thought, referring to the book. _(Everyone was still staring)_ Then she stopped at a small note on the flip-side of the page. 'This alchemy, be it transmutation to male or female, will only work once. This is because both are linked and the body will only naturally accept one gender change. This is irreversible.' Her jaw dropped again. She was gonna stay this way?

Riza read through it, and spoke again. "Too bad, Edward. Now we really need to find you a place to stay… I believe all of us here can't have you at our places…" The rest of them nodded.

"We all live in one-room apartments." Fury spoke.

"It'll be better if you stayed with Riza, though, since you are female now…" Havoc added.

"But I already have Black Hayate with me; he takes the couch." Riza frowned. "Hey, Roy can take you in."

Ed was surprised. "What? Stay with the person who made me like this? You've got to be kidding me!"

Riza continued, "But Roy's the only one who lives in a bigger apartment. You can take one of any of his rooms… safer for you…" Her voice trailed off as she turned to look at a bemused Roy.

"Oh, right; you think I'll take advantage of her or something? Come on Edward, I think we better leave." He took the stunned girl by the hands and pulled her through the door. All through the military building came gasps of surprise, and not to mention Edward's scream that came at the end of it.

* * *

_Notes: LOL. I had a bad shock after the mirror incident. solemnly swears not to look at another mirror again So...ok. Ed stays with the Fuhrer. A VERY cheeky Fuhrer. Stay tuned for more. Oh, and how do you turn the 'anon.' thing on? I have no idea. I'm new to this, remember?_


	4. Only I Can Take You In… PartII

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

I actually typed out both chapters on the same day ((got a really bad headache after that)) so here's the following! No fluffy stuff yet;I still haven't recovered from that shock. groans as the scene plays over and over again

* * *

Chapter 4 Only I Can Take You In… Part II 

A very disgruntled Ed plopped onto the sofa of Roy's apartment. The gang was right; his place is big _(comes from being a Fuhrer) _and he had many rooms… but so what? She had just been shown to the world for what she is now, all thanks to that no good bastard of a Fuhrer. Roy, on the other hand, was fixing a cup of coffee _(he can't live without it) _and settled in beside Ed. She moved away from him.

"Don't come any closer; I want to have nothing to do with you." Ed huffed. The door bell rang. Roy went to open the door.

"Hey there Ed. Brought you your clothes from the hotel. And Riza's here with clothes for you, too." Havoc said as he entered the house with Riza in tow. Riza handed him the package. "I need to talk to you about certain things…" She pulled a curious looking Ed into one of the rooms.

Havoc was left with Roy back at his seat sipping coffee. "Does this mean that Ed will stay here and not report to work?" He asked his superior.

Roy put his cup down. "I'm afraid not. Since the whole military crew has seen Ed, it'd be weird for hi—her to keep hiding." He took another sip. "Besides, we still need Full Metal to carry on the search."

"What? You mean the last homunculus?" Havoc asked with surprise. "I didn't know the search was still on."

There was a sudden "WHAT?" that came from the room that Ed and Riza were in, then a few scuffling later, they emerged, with Ed's face looking some what like clouds on rainy days, and in a different attire. Roy gave Riza a look; it was responded with a shrug then she turned to Havoc.

"I think it's time we leave. Ed's had a hard day." Both bid the duo good night, then left the house.

Roy closed the door after them. Stealing a glance at the girl _(who still had a thunderous look on her face)_ on the couch, he sat next to her again. She looked pretty cute, but was still on the small side _((you guys know where he's looking at, right?))_. Edward caught his glance and blushed _(not really knowing why she blushed though)_

"Hey, keep your eyes off of me, you creep." Edward folded her arms across her chest.

"What did Riza tell you that made you look so glum?"

Edward shrugged. "Girl's stuff." She got up from the sofa, gave a big yawn _(Roy found that cute too.)_ and looked at the clock on the wall. It showed 10 pm, close to 11. She threw a disgusted look at Roy, then said she was gonna sleep.

Just before she closed her door, she transmuted the lock into her own lock. Roy's eyebrow went up then.

"For my own protection, from you." Then she slammed the door.

Roy sighed. He put the now empty cup into the sink, planning to wash it tomorrow. With a glance at the guest room's door, he gave another sigh. So what if he gets attracted to her now? _'You are a girl now, aren't you? There's probably no way of changing you back, and that leaves me free to…'_ He broke his chain of thoughts, and then went to his own room. He had another long day ahead.

* * *

_Notes: Yar yar; I know it's short. Wanted to cut Chpt 3 but couldn't. Like I said - got headache. And I'm hungry. Ciao. Remeber to review! Willing to accept no reviews for Chpt 3._


	5. The Prankstress

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

_Yes, I deleted the earlier chapter for this AWAY. I know I could have replaced it, but then… I dunno what made me delete… not that I didn't like it, but I just came up with something better later on, realised that the starting was a bit off if I wanted the new part, so I had to rewrite! So, ya. And no worries, it has the same title as before._

_By the way… SO SORRY THAT I HAVEN'T UPDATED FOR SO LONG! I mean, I've really been very busy: 10 projects thrown at us to be completed within each week… (ok, may be not so many, but there were at least 6) so I really had no time to be thinking about the story, let alone typing it out. So, as a compensation, here's a really, REALLY long chappie. And I'll not deprive you of it any further. ENJOY---_

* * *

Chapter 5 The Prankstress

Visions of a young blonde in skirt flow past his eyes; funny how she seemed familiar, and yet not at the same time…

_Wait… Isn't that FullMetal?… What the…_

Roy stuffed his fingers into his ears as his piercing alarm went off. That was futile however, and he un-plugged his ears to shut the alarm up.

He sat up… and wondered about the dream.

_Ed? A girl…? In a SKIRT!_

Then it hit him in a rush: the book, the transmutations, the screaming. And the girl. He gave a big, long yawn, recalling as well the similar yawn _(which he defined cute)_ from the younger alchemist the night before. He smiled.

Glancing towards the now silent clock, he got off his bed and proceeded to do the necessary. Time read 8.30 am, and although it seemed too damn bright for some reason, he calmly walked into the bathroom. There was to be an important meeting later at 10 – so he still had the time. The funny thing? Edward was no where to be seen…

---

Time: 9.40 am. He was cruising down the street in his Mustang and turned as the entrance to the military car park came into view. He was surprised at the number of unfamiliar cars in the lots: had his colleagues from other districts arrived early for the meeting?

He walked towards the receptionist, who gave him a strange look and glanced at her wristwatch. Roy simply passed her his clock-in card, only to have her shrugging her shoulders, punch the card and handing it back to him.

Looking at the card as he walked off, he noticed the time stated was 10.47 am. He frowned, but still believed in his own pocket watch. The machine must have had an error; so did the receptionist.

He walked straight into the meeting room, thinking that there would only be a few people in the room so that he could hold a casual conversation with before everyone gets there and the meeting starts. How wrong he was. The table was fully occupied _(except for his seat of course)_ and its members were in deep discussion. All traces of speech dissolved, however, when Roy strode in and froze at the sight.

"Are… Aren't you all supposed to start by 10?" Roy broke the silence.

"Very right you are."

Edward was sitting at the table too _(she's the Colonel now, remember?)_, and turned to smirk at him.

"And you, as a Fuhrer, are LATE."

Roy was shocked. Him, late? NO WAY. He pulled out his pocket watch and glanced into the silverware.

"Strange… mine still reads 9.59, and, ah, now it's 10; the hands are still moving. So now it starts, isn't it?"

Edward gave a hollow laugh, then smirked at him again, and pulled her own pocket watch. The rest of the table followed suit _(well, those who have did, those who didn't flicked their wrists…)_

"Then your pocket watch is screwed then; you see, all of ours," she gestured across the table, "are reading 11am."

Roy looked at the watches glinting in the light. True enough, time was reading 11.01 now… Then how…?

It hit him again like in the morning. The culprit was now sitting there, smirking at him for all she's worth. He frowned and glared at the young alchemist, who, if possible, smirked all the wider. He took his seat at the head of the table, and settled down.

"Never mind that then," he said to the looks of furrowed eyebrows and one smirking Colonel, "let's start from the beginning again…"

---

After the meeting, all his head subordinates were gathered in his office. That, of course, included Ed. By now, Ed had stopped smirking – it was her jaw that did the protesting, and so she settled for a lofty expression instead. Roy had once again walked into the office full of surly looking people – they were told to be there at 1pm… and it was now 2pm plus… They complained of course. They always did. They all knew Roy more than just a Fuhrer… more like a dear friend.

And thattended to get to their heads.

"Argh, ROY! The meeting couldn't have dragged by one hour!"

"That's right! Look at the time! We haven't had lunch yet, you know…"

"Yar, and I'm starving. You gotta give us a treat, sir. We all came like an hour ago to report to you and all…"

It simply went on… until Edward cleared her throat and said something that sent the room into silence.

"Er-hem… the Fuhrer, I believe, had time problems and issues this morning…"

After a moment of quiet, the whole room started blabbing again. This time, though, before it managed to reach fish-market standards, Roy stopped them.

"ALL RIGHT! I admit, my watches are all screwed this morning—″ here, he threw a frown in Ed's direction, "—and yes, I'll treat you all to lunch. Now, I guess. But make sure you report everything to me after that in my office. Ok, let's go."

As he let the others file out of his room, he grabbed the blonde alchemist by the shoulder and held her back. He muttered softly into her ear, "And I'll see you personally after the reports are done…"

He couldn't help give a smirk of his own when he noticed the glum look on the little Colonel's face…

---

They managed to find an unoccupied table with the appropriate number of seats and settled down in the canteen. Looking at other military personnel sipping their own cups of coffee, he decided it was high time for his much awaited first dose of caffeine _(he forgot his usual first cup this morning)_ and told Edward _(more like, ordered)_ to get the drinks for the table. Edward sulked off… she really hated errands.

When food was settled, Edward still hadn't returned with the drinks. When she did, however, all she carried on the tray _(stacked, piled, whatever have you)_ were cups and cups of…

TEA.

Roy, being that kind of I-love-coffee-hate-tea person, did not notice it _(he was tackling his food already)_ and set down his fork and spoon to drink what he thought was coffee.

It was tea which flew _(spewed)_ in all directions, just a second later, and it was all over his food, his companions beside and in front of him, and their food. He set the cup down and turned to face Edward, who was happily eating away a few seats away from the Fuhrer.

"I thought I told you I wanted coffee?"

Edward gave a shrug, while still eating, and said with her mouth half full, "I asked for it, but the vendor said they ran out of it earlier… _(which has happened before)_ and stayed there longer to make sure of it and to get the tea… I simply didn't know you hated tea _((LIE!))_ that's all…" Everyone looked at each other for a few moments, then went back to their eating anyways _(those who had Roy's tea all over theirs got them changed…Roy too got up with a grunt and went to change his food)_.

Just before they left for his office again, some of the group noticed Ed back at the drinks stall having a quick chat with the vendor, and then…

Cash changed hands.

They grinned, and passed the info around. Apparently Roy was in for a rough time…

Except that he doesn't know it.

* * *

_Ah well, hope that was long enough. I actually had it written all out on paper in school (having no personal laptop of my own really sucks) and had to HAND TYPE everything into Word document…eesh. Everyone please pray that I get a laptop soon… Then I'll be able to update faster._

_Forgot to mention… I HAD to break off at this point. Really. I'm too tired and besides, I want this story to have as many chapters as I can. So stay in-tuned ok? Read and review!_


	6. The Prankstress II

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

_I forgot that there was no way anybody could review for the changed chapter… so now I'll type in the next one! Seriously though, I wish I had my laptop… a 5 hour break in school and we all watched 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory' on one of my friends' laptop… and the problem? I'm the only one who doesn't have a laptop! _

_And people… if you can get the song for FMA's movie, LOST HEAVEN by L'ArcenCiel, please do so. I know Gendou (dot) com has it, but it's a bit of a hassle since you have to be a member first. But membership is free… HA. Also want to say that this is the position for Edward, Roy and Riza and the rest: Roy - Fuhrer, Ed - Colonel, Riza - Lt. Colonel & secretary to Roy; Breda Farman, Fury and rest of crew mostly Majors or Captains. Fury and Havoc (I think) and some other majors (all unknown) are in another district... will think of putting them back here in Central later. And for the postions just below Roy, which are General, Lt. General, Major General and Bridgadier General, they are all unknown people. And some are stationed elsewhere too. Haha._

_And here's the next out of 3 chapters of the Prankstress. Enjoy!_

* * *

Chapter 6 The Prankstress II – More Mayhem

Back in the office, Roy was busy signing and doing paperwork… but he wasn't really getting anywhere. He was seriously, SERIOUSLY needing a cup of coffee. And he simply couldn't have it… all because of the little minx, who was examining the books at on his shelf. Tutting ever so often at the information that was found in the books, she slammed them back into the shelf after every pick.

The slamming and tutting finally got to Roy's headache, and he cleared his throat very loudly and stared at Edward. The latter, of course, stared right back.

"What? You asked me to stay behind didn't you? So what exactly do you want?"

"Come here, will you?"

Edward put the book back in the shelf (slamming it again) and walked round the sofa to the great oak table and stood in front of the frowning Fuhrer. She folded her arms in front of her, and tapped her foot impatiently.

"Well?"

Roy stood up. He had quite enough. Leaning over so that their faces were only an inch apart, he spoke to her in an undertone, "I know what you did, and don't think you can get away with it." Edward blinked, then looked up towards the ceiling.

Roy straightened, and sat back down. Just then, Riza walked in with her own pile of paperwork. Roy got an idea.

"Say… Edward, I want you to go with Riza and MAKE-ME-A-CUP-OF-COFFEE," he emphasised the last part of the sentence, then leaned over again and whispered, "as punishment of course."

He added on to Riza, "Lt. Colonel, I want you as both my Lt.C and secretary to keep watch on hi—her and make sure she gets it right. You may have to teach her the process in the first place, if need be." He smirked.

Edward gave a frown. She wanted to protest, but then thought the better of it. Still with eyebrows fused together, she left the room in Riza's wake. Roy smiled. He knew Ed simply hated all kinds of errands.

Little did Roy know, or see, of course, was that a smirk had played across the young Colonel's face as she walked out of the door…

---

"Here's your coffee. Sir." Riza set the cup in front of him. Roy's eyebrow lifted; he looked back and forth Riza and Ed.

"if you are wondering who made it, it was Sir – I mean, Ma'am Elric (Edward cringed at that)_((I cringed at this too))_who did it. She even broke the coffee pot in the process (Edward huffed) so this is your one and only cup. And I watched over her just to make sure she did the right things as you ordered, Sir." She saluted and walked back to her desk to get started on her own pile of work. Roy gave the young alchemist one long look (who shrugged for the breaking of the pot) before bringing the cup to his lips and taking a swig.

Once again, liquid spurted out of Roy's mouth (coffee this time, and that being the second time for today spewing something) and all over the paperwork he had been halfway through. He cursed and swore till even the air around Riza's ears sizzled, to which Ed promptly started sniggering.

Roy snapped his head up to his Colonel, and then to his surprised secretary, who stood up from her work, going, "…But I made sure she did the right steps, added the right ingredients…"

That really sent Edward into louder peals of laughter; clutching her stomach, she tried to salute as she hung by the door to deliver her last message, "Well… that shows I'm innocent right? Enjoy your coffee, Sir!" and then left the office, walking past a very surprised looking Breda.

Breda walked into the office through the open doors, and he turned his attention from the open door to his superior. He saluted, and noticed the coffee spray. He smiled inwardly.

"May I ask what happened, Sir?"

Roy simply pointed to the coffee cup, which was now half empty. Breda took a swig of his own, and did a Roy there and then.

"Eeew," he said wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, "SALT. No wonder."

* * *

_Ah ha… Finally this chapter is finished. I actually worked on this for 4 straight days… not that my typing is slow, but I was thrown with soo many things that by the time I just started typing the chapter, Major Mum comes in and orders me to switch off… haha… so… -.-lll_

_Anyways, I accept that there were no reviews last chapter since they don't allow it, but this chapter please review! Thank you! Note: if people didn't notice, I changed chapter 5 ok? So go re read it if you haven't. And the movie summary's out, go check fullmetal-alchemist(dot)com for more details._


	7. The Prankstress III

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

_Wee… I told you that I had the next three chapters written out right? So, ya, here's the next one… and I think it may take slightly longer for me to update nowadays. Reason that I've been able to use the computer again was because my brother left for Taiwan for the Army. So generally the computer is all mine. But then I told you that I had all those nonsensical projects thrown at me that I really had no time… But don't worry: I already have the full story planned out – and I hope to drag it slightly past 20 chapters (if I can drag it that long) and I have a few later chapters written in bits and scraps of paper…_

_Here we have chapter 7, a second last chapter, and when I finish typing chapter 8 I think I may have a long break again… unless some one would be so kind to give me a laptop. Without further ado, enjoy ._

* * *

Chapter 7 The Prankstress III – A Severely Coffee-Deprived Fuhrer

Riza was once again in the printing room to have the entire stack of Roy's paperwork re-printed. The typewriter pulled out the last sheet, gave a huge sigh of relief, and handed the completed pile to Riza. The latter smiled her thanks, and left the room.

Halfway to the Fuhrer's office, she was stopped by Major Havoc, who told her that both of them were needed elsewhere. Looking at the pile in her hands, she wondered whether there was anyone who could pass it to Roy, when Edward just walked past both of them on her way to her office _((you forget she has one?))_. She spotted the two, who saluted and Havoc said that he was doing as the colonel requested, and ran off to recruit more people.

Riza decided that the only way for the papers to reach Roy was to have her colonel pass it to him… but for now she really didn't like to trust the younger superior in front her. In any case, she told Edward to pass the pile to the Fuhrer on her way to the office and left in the direction where Havoc went.

The young colonel smiled as she watched her orders being carried out (though it was actually under the General's order, she still had her subordinates to run around for her) and looked down at the pile of papers in her hand, thinking for a moment.

Then she smirked, and headed instead to her office first before making her way to the Fuhrer's office. _((yes, she's up to something again))_

---

Time: 8 pm. Roy stuffed his pocket watch back into his pocket, then cupped his head in his hands. It was already so late; everyone had gone home long ago. Well, everyone except him and Riza. Riza looked drained; the conference that many have been dragged to had lasted longer than usual, and now she was trying to rush out her own paperwork. With her presence of ever signing papers and other things adding pressure to Roy, he put his hands down and continued his. It was pretty hard considering that he had had no coffee for the whole day, and that he had to start all over after when Edward gave him the freshly printed pile after she caused him to spit coffee all over the previous pile.

Just then Riza stood up and neatened her pile; she had finished hers. She walked towards the Fuhrer, who shrugged and passed his pile to her saying, "…I can't continue…"

She gave a sigh, then looked through the pile to see where he had stopped. After a few moments of flipping she frowned, then started to flip back and forth. From the first quarter, then the second quarter, then finally the 3rd quarter of the pile where there weren't anymore signatures… She looked down at the weary Fuhrer.

"Erm, Sir?"

"Just Roy, Riza; everyone else has gone home." He waved a hand across his face.

"Yes, Roy; erm… I think you need to know," passing him back the pile to see, "that you've probably finished it long ago."

He jerked his head up. "What do you mean by that?" He hadn't taken the pile from her hands yet, so Riza waved it in front of him.

"I guess you have to see it for yourself."

He took the pile back and looked through the entire stack of papers. A few moments later, his jaw dropped. He flipped back and forth like Riza did, then looked up, horror-struck.

"I signed the same pile over and over?"

Riza gave a sympathetic nod, and took the first quarter of the pile from his hands. Giving a salute, she left the room with Roy still staring at the other 'photocopied' piles he had been signing for nothing. All of a sudden they crumbled into torn pieces of paper and blots of ink, staining his table in the process. He frowned, then shook with anger of realisation.

"HA-GA-NE—!"

* * *

_HOOHAH. Finally this chapter is finished. And you know what? It was done on the laptop! I finally got one, except that it isn't really mine; it belongs to my uncle, and the letter 's' is missing from the keyboard. So ya, a bit tedious having to specially type out the 's'. Read and review please! I dunno why there weren't any for the number 6!_


	8. The Prankstress LAST

Disclaimer: I dun own FMA. Duh.

Chapter 8 The Prankstress IV – The Prankstress Gets It

* * *

Roy unlocked the door to his mega-big apartment and dragged himself in. Not to mention he had been dragging himself from the office meeting, the car and now home. He still had one thing to drag through – that 'something' was now sitting on his sofa, sipping a cup of coffee from his coffee cabinet (as in, his coffee powder) with her eyes closed and face holding that haughty look. As she heard the door close, she turned up and smirked at the half-dead Fuhrer as if what happened earlier was only round one.

…Which would be quite true: Roy needed his daily dose of coffee.

Now.

"…You… sitting there, you…" Roy dragged himself again to his kitchen to make his own mug of coffee.

"What? You want me to do something for you? Again?" she asked. The yell would be coming anytime now…

"…You… Completely—wrecked—my-" Roy paused.

He was staring at his favourite, most precious cupboard. The one which kept his beloved, most priced coffee powder, in the porcelain jar, safe from other people's reach. Except…

The brown jar wasn't there.

It took him a moment for him to realise that he won't be getting any coffee for the next… oh, I dunno: 3 or 4 days? And that's when he pounced on Edward, who gave a small yelp (she was still expecting a yell, not a pounce) and spilt out a bit of the coffee onto the rug.

"Where's my coffee powder jar? What did you do with it?" he was actually pleading now, with both hands on her shoulders, and shaking her back and forth. Hard.

Alarmed, Edward set the now empty cup (shaking never keeps anything in one place) onto the coffee table and shook off Roy's hands while scrambling out of reach and replied, "It…. It broke… while I was… while I was making this cup…" She pointed to her right.

Roy let his arms dropped, seized the empty cup, and then stared at the coffee-stained rug. Realising that he just ruined his last chance of drinking coffee, he finally broke down ((not in crying, but in howling, sheesh. There are NO tears.)) Edward stared at him, still slightly shocked at what a coffee-deprived Roy is (mentally making note that this is a major weakness) and gingerly crawled back towards him and patted him on the back.

"Gee… sorry, I guess I went overboard this time… is that a sentimental item of yours? Or is it because you seriously need coffee?" Roy stopped his howling as he smelt the breath (Ed's) of coffee. He looked up at Ed's face, and suddenly noted the coffee stains (very slight) around Ed's mouth.

Though he knew it was disgraceful ((in a sense anyway…)) and that as a gentleman, he shouldn't be doing this, but he was damn, DAMN desperate. Seriously.

Edward only managed to catch the look on Roy's face a little too late. Next thing she knew was Roy's arms around her, and that their lips were sealed together. She opened her mouth to gasp, and Roy took that chance. Edward's eyes widened to full capacity as Roy tasted her… she felt his tongue twine around hers…

The funny thing? She didn't want to pull away!

Although her mind was yelling away, "Let go of me!" her body was not paying heed at all…

When Roy finally pulled away, feeling better than before, both were blushing (Ed's extremely so) and were gasping for breathe. Roy simply licked his lips.

"That," he said as he gave Edward a glare, "was for EVERYTHING."

Edward couldn't reply. She was too stunned at what had just happened. Her mental yelling hadn't ceased, and this time it was yelling for her to strike back (as in, with fists) and yell. She couldn't move though. Dimly she noted that… hey, not a bad kisser after all… And her whole body gave an involuntary twitch.

Roy noticed that; with a bit of caffeine in his blood (even that tiny amount) he really perked up, and he moved closer to Ed (whose body gave another twitch) until their faces were an inch apart before saying, "…You want more?"

Edward didn't make a sound, but Roy felt her body twitch again. Taking that as a yes, he had her all over again. This time, he also let his hands roam; and was pleased when Ed gave another twitch at the first touch. What made him happier was that, he felt her hands roaming his body later.

They almost got to the stage where it involved the removal of clothes, when Edward finally gasped and pushed Roy away. Looking utterly confused, she at least managed to stammer out "…Ba….Baka Taisa…" before leaping from the sofa and bolting into the guest room where she locked her door (normally).

Roy, too, for one, was a little surprised himself; he thought that the initial attraction to the alchemist was temporary, but clearly his actions earlier (coffee-dosed too) were stating otherwise.

As he walked past her room, he stopped and wanted to knock, but thought against it, and instead faced the wooden feature and mumbled, "It's 'Fuhrer', not 'Taisa'; YOU are MY little Taisa now…" then turned to walk into his room where he got ready for bed.

Ed on the other hand… well, she didn't even bother about the coffee stains on the pyjamas (which is actually Riza's, meaning that she SHOULD get it cleaned…) and was now lying down on her bed.

Not sleeping though. The scene that happened a moment ago constantly floated across her mind… It turned to minutes… then hours…

Finally, before her lids banged shut, she concluded in defeat that, yes, she is slightly attracted to that damned Fuhrer… and that… was bad. Very bad.

* * *

_Well, not so bad… at least it made to 3 pages, haha. More 'exciting' stuff coming up (hopefully, provided my brain is working) and I sincerely apologise to all for the long, long wait. I really have no time at all. I've been doing CG (computer graphics) for a certain picture and it's giving me a headache; drawn a couple more things that I posted on my deviantart account, and I've been working too! So, yar. A big fat sorry. GOMEN DESU DESU!_


	9. Dreams of Dreams

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: How I wish and wish that I owned FMA…… But that's not gonna work of course.

_Oh my God… I finally have an inspiration! Goodness gracious. Because it was kinda hard to continue after what happened in the last chapter to link up with the other chapters for this story that I've already planned… _

_But now I've found something to write about… probably after this chapter, it'll be some short and comical little drabbles for this story… trying to build up the relation between Roy and Ed a little more… up till' the point where they can… er-hem. I won't elaborate.

* * *

_

Chapter 9 Dreams of Dreams

… _He was running…_

_Panting, he stopped in front of the abandoned church, where his foe was now hiding._

_His auto-mail arm wasn't functioning all that well, but his metal leg still enabled him to run this far, despite the heavy bleeding. Just behind him, he heard the familiar clangs of someone he dearly knew run up to him. He smiled, then turned to face his brother._

"_We'll get that last Stone for sure, Al… LET'S GO!" His footsteps fell in beat to his brother's clangs, and they charged through the huge doors of the church._

_Running down to the basement of the holy institute, following the trails of blood, he paused to catch up his own breath, while his brother patiently waited. When he was better and felt calmer, he stood up and broke down the door. A shock ran through him as he saw something, something red and huge, seated behind his foe, who was now facing him._

_The Philosopher's Stone… and, oh my, how big it was. And he could bet for sure that his foe would not let him get to it. Not after he had finished off practically all of his foe's comrades, except for one. That one, being a woman, he had left for the military to pick up. _

"…_Why, why; good one, o-chibi-san. You've managed to chase all the way here."_

_He kept his cool at the one word he hated the most in the entire world. Putting that aside, he planted his feet firmly on the ground and replied in a cold voice, "And that sure means you have no where else to run to, Envy. Under military orders and my own, I swear I'll happily reunite you with the rest of your clan."_

"_Heh," smirked Envy, "…my clan. MY clan. Pfft. Who cares about those fools who followed that even bigger fool of a woman… I work for myself, and the only thing I care about is the suffering of people and of course, creating this magnificent stone behind me."_

_He folded his arms across his chest, and then retorted, "Why in the world do YOU, a nearly-immortal Homunculus, find a need of the Stone? I have a purpose for it, that's for sure and you know it. By the way… aren't you supposed to be attached to Dante? Funny that you can be loose at what you call her though. I suppose the real reason for protecting the Stone is for her sake after all?" he smirked sentimental item of yours… can_'_t figure out for the life of me why it had to be your wedding ring though… seeing that you are definitely ce, and readied himself. _

"_We'll see about that, Envy; we'll see." He lunged._

_Blow after blow struck his foe's face; smiling, henoticed that his foe, unlike in the past duals with him, was visibly weakened. Not to mention that his armour suited brother was there to assist him. Envy the Homunculus leapt away from them, now panting and then vomited a few small Stones out, which immediately melted on the cold floor of the church. Sweating uncontrollably, Envy slowly looked at him, then asked, "…What is it that you have… How can it be that I'm so weakened…?"_

_Straightening himself, and wiping the blood off his lips, it was his turn to smirk at the shivering creature. In response to the question, he sunk his left hand into his pocket and clenched his fist around a hard, cold object._

"…_Why… are you referring to this by any chance, Envy?" And he pulled the ring out of his pocket._

_Envy shrank back from it. Utterly weakened, he could only croak, "…Where… just where… did you get that from…? I… I have no memory… of that item… why the hell… why does it…"_

_Leaving the ring enclosed by his left fist, he replied in a low tone, "Don't think we didn't do any research of you… We figured out who you really were, in the past, before you were made what you are today… naturally, tracing all the way back, we managed to find a sentimental item of yours… can't figure out for the life of me why it had to be your wedding ring though… seeing that you are definitely not a nice person to marry… I suppose your wife must have sought some way to try to bring you back after you died…" A sudden pain erupted from his abdomen; the earlier fights with the other Homunculi have finally taken a toll over him. He bent down and coughed out a little blood. His brother clanged beside him in panic._

"_You alright, Nii-san?" He was helped onto his feet by his little brother, then proceeded towards Envy in a determined manner._

"_I'm fine, Al… Envy, I'm afraid, won't be…" As he reached Envy, he raised his arm in attempt to give the Homunculus another blow._

_At that very moment, the military people burst in and he turned his head to look at who had interrupted them. Seizing the chance, Envy got up and knocked the ring out of his hands. The ring sailed right out of the window, into the immense density of bushes and wild shrub that had been growing around the church for decades. Envy took a last blow at him, right in the middle, and then dashed past the surprised military personnel. He collapsed after the blow, though not all that strong but enough to take him down. _

_His brother was panicky again. Rushing towards him, he was cradled in his brother's metallic but hollow arms, all the while questioning him, "Are you really alright, Nii-san? You must have hurt yourself pretty badly after the fight between King Bradley… You should rest for a while…"_

_At that precise moment, Colonel Mustang stepped in, followed by the usual crowd: Havoc, Hawkeye, Breda, Farman and even Fuery. The Colonel looked around at the lack of blood in the area, and then at him, totally worn-out in his brother's arms, and then commented, "He got away then? Good enough, the only thing we need to be doing now is getting rid of the Stone…"_

_At this, he almost jumped right out of his brother's arms again, but only managed to do a sit-up due to his injuries, and yelled, "…But –!"_

"_Relax, I was just about to say that you might have a use for it… and I dare that you really have. Go on, it's all yours for keeps. People, file out!"_

_The rest of the officers marched out, leaving behind his brother and him. He slid out of the clutches of his brother, then walked towards the gigantic red object._

"…_Al, come here. I'll fulfill the promise I made to you so many years ago…"_

_He brought his hands together… and touched both the Stone and his brother at the same time. _

_There forth erupted a great burst of light… and when it ended, all he could see was his brother standing in front of him, examining human hands and a perfect body. Smiling, he walked forwards to hug his brother, who in his daze managed to hug him back. _

"_Nii-san… all of the Stone was used up… What about your arm and leg…? Nii-san…"_

_She pulled back from him, expecting to see her beloved brother's true face once more, but only had a shock when it was the Fuhrer's that she was seeing. The same Fuhrer that she was currently staying with, the very same who promoted her to her current position in the military… _

_She tried to pull away from him, but couldn't as his grip around her was like iron-clamps. He was simply hugging her, refusing to let go, and after realising he won't let her go, she stopped trying to escape. That was when he opened his eyes, and moved closer to her face… their lips were almost touching…_

_-- -- -- -- -- -- --_

Edward flipped her eyes open in panic, and then squinted them almost shut again in the blaring sunlight. She slowly got up, and took in her surroundings. Looking down at herself, she blinked and then got up to remove the pyjamas… the coffee stain should NOT have been left as it is… Riza's so going to kill her now… She shook herself off what she had 'seen' and changed into her military uniform…

* * *

_Wow… I hit 4 pages… _

_And you see, I am slowly trying to build up the relation between Roy and Ed. Though it may take some time till' my next update, please bear with me. Ciaoz now._


	10. Of Scheduled Meetings & What Not

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Duh.

_Funny. Didn't I say that there will be a long break again? But I came back! Hahah. Never mind. Let's continue from where we left off, shall we? Lemme see… oh yes. Poor Ed had a funny dream. Let's go!

* * *

Chapter 10 Of Scheduled Meetings and What-Not…Part I_

Ed slowly made her way to the bathroom. There wasn't one in her room, so she walked ((hmm, shuffled would be a better word)) to the one that was located in the kitchen.

Meaning that she shuffled past Roy, who was clearly having trouble trying to make breakfast for two: he was such a terrible cook. Why, he can't even simply spread strawberry jam properly on to two pieces of bread without spreading some on his hands and the table as well.

As a last straw, after standing there looking blurrily as Roy dropped the third slice of bread, she walked over to him, took the butter knife, dipped it in jam, took two new slices and evenly spread them onto both slices. She slapped them together, handed them to the stunned Roy and walked to where she was heading for in the first place: the bathroom.

Roy continued to stare at the completed jam bread in his hand, even after Ed had emerged from the morning necessities. She sat down in front of him, then pulled the loaf of bread, bottle of jam and the butter knife towards her. His jaw dropped, if possible, even further when she began to spread jam on her own bread, and there by consuming it on her own. While chewing, she glanced up at him and realized he still had his mouth open. Leaning forward, she grabbed his hand with the bread and stuffed it into his mouth. He woke up instantly.

"Mmmph pfffhhmmm… " and he took a bite out of the bread. Edward stopped chewing and gave him a strange look.

"Wha…?"

Roy swallowed his mouthful of bread.

"I said, I would have never imagined… "

"Imagined what?" she continued chewing.

"Imagined that you even know how to make your own brea…!" He stared somewhere off Ed's shoulder.

Edward caught that look, then followed his gaze to her shoulder and saw what he saw. She sighed, then pulled the strap back to her shoulders and glared at Roy.

"What's the matter? Can't it slip off my shoulders?" She blushed a little, then carried on eating her bread.

Roy ignored the question, and stammered, "…Bu….But that's… Funny… You weren't wearing one the… the night before…" At this, he nervously bit off another mouthful of his bread.

Ed, too, blushed all the redder and looked down. Murmuring, she replied softly enough as if she didn't want any one else to hear (though it was only the two of them around), "I… I only wear it when I go to work… Riza's…"

At the mention of Riza's name, Roy recovered. He smirked at what the blonde had said and made a comment of his own to spite the little alchemist.

"Ah… Riza's is it?...No wonder. You're definitely smaller in size compared to her…"

He ducked as a half-eaten bread flew past where his head had been a few seconds earlier. Her face still relatively red, she was on her two feet and positively swearing under her breath. Before Roy could ask her to calm down though, she grabbed the last piece of jam bread (she made two) and walked off to sit down at the sofa.

Considering what had happened the night before on that very sofa, Roy was surprised she would even sit there at all. He got up from his crouched position and slid onto the sofa next to her. He was also kind of surprised that she never exploded in the usual way she did when anyone called her small. ("_WHO ARE YOU CALLING…" you know, that one?_)

She didn't shift away even though he was beside her. The only thing that she did though, was to give Roy a good kick in the leg when he tried, taking her hand with bread, to take a bite out of it. He simply rubbed his leg for a moment then slung his arm around her.

"Matured finally? Never knew you could hold your temper that well before…" He smiled as Edward gave a small "Hmmph" in response, and turned her head away.

Roy reached out with his other hand and turned her face back to look at him. With an absolutely straight face he asked, "You remember what happened right here, last night?"

That brought an immense blush to Ed's face as she almost jumped right out of the sofa. Almost, that is, Roy managed to hold her back and brought her beside him again. He got a bread slap in the face for that, as Ed spat, "If that's what you want, you can have it!" She tried to pull free again, but failed as Roy held fast to her. Ed blushed all the more; she hadn't forgotten what she had seen in the last parts of her dream… it almost felt as if it was replaying right before her eyes.

True enough, Roy stood up and hugged her tightly. As they pulled apart, they encountered a moment of silence as, Roy gazed into her eyes. Sort of expecting a kiss after that, Ed made to turn away.

But once again Roy turned her face back to his. Slowly, but surely, he leaned forward in an effort to seal their lips together. Ed was startled; her dream WAS coming true! She tried in vain to pull away, but knew she couldn't because Roy still held her tight. As his lips gently brushed against hers, she tingled all over with a funny feeling that she couldn't put a name too. Roy pulled back for a moment, waiting.

True enough, she tip-toed (she couldn't really reach him, hahaha) and kissed right back, though a bit clumsily. The tip-toeing caused her to go slightly off balance but Roy was still holding on to her, so she…how should you say… did a stumble-forward-then-kiss. All in all, it WAS clumsy.

Their lips sealed tightly for a few moments, before Edward broke off and murmured with a totally red face, "We're gonna be late for work…"

She almost walked away, when Roy held her hand back.

"Wait…" Roy pulled her back and then reached out nip the sensitive skin at Ed's neck. Ed gasped, and turned all the more red. After a while, he released the girl (who face now resembled a tomato) and smirked at her.

"That," he said as he stood upright once more, "was for kicking and slapping me. NOW we can go."

Ed put a hand over her neck that just had been nipped by Roy. Knowing that a mark would probably be there, and pretty much visible to anyone should they walk past her, she glared at him.

"So I supposed that you want the whole wide world to know what we possibly do every time we step into this house!"

"… I guess you can say that." And Roy walked out of the door with Ed fuming and swearing in his wake.

-------

In the dark corners of an alley way, a cat prowled out, but just managed to remain in the shadows.

It quickly shuttled back into deeper shadows when a car drove past. As the great machine drove past, the cat managed to spot the faces in the car. A middle-aged, black-haired man took the wheel, and his passenger, a teenage blonde female with a grumpy look on her face. Both had military uniform on them, and the cat, if possible, registered all looks of shock on its face when he spotted the young passenger.

And, if all the more possible still, it managed a malicious grin, then bounded up the alley wall in three leaps. At the top of the wall however, the cat had changed. Spreading its night-black wings, the raven took off to the skies…

* * *

It was about three in the afternoon. Edward had just finished her lunch in the canteen, and was now in the military library at her own leisure. Reading totally drowns out anything else; even as they were kids, she and Al would totally be engrossed in the alchemy books of their father's and could hardly hear their mother calling them to eat from the kitchen. That is, until she strides right up to them of course.

So much to the extent of drowning anything else out, Edward didn't even notice a raven perched at the window sill right beside the comfy chair that she was seated on, reading.

The black raven hopped in from the window and onto the back of Edward's chair. The little alchemist didn't notice. Why, she was so small, her head hardly reached the top part of the chair. The raven bent down to look at what she was reading.

"_**THE BIOT-SAVART LAW**_

_In the previous section we saw how **B** could be found experimentally; it can also be calculated utilising the Biot-Savart Law._

_The calculation involves considering a conductor as consisting a number of very short lengths, each of which contributes to the total field at any point. Biot and Savart **stated** that for a very short length(l) of conductor, carrying a steady current(i), the magnitude of the flux density at a point P distance **r **from **l** is…" _And there after followed a series of complex formulas.

The raven cocked its head to one side. The little pip-squeak was reading Physics! …Whatever she read, she was utterly engrossed in it. 'Why, here I stand and she hasn't noticed a thing!'

The raven straightened its head. It hopped down to the arm of the chair. Still oblivious. It hopped down onto the table in front of Ed. Utterly ignored.

Almost squawking with fury now, it flew up…

And landed onto the pages of the book she was reading.

Edward was the one who did the squawking. Totally caught off guard, she let out a cry that was not very different from a crow's as she hadn't been talking since her meal ((not using your voice makes you croak… why do you think you sound like you do when you try to talk after being woken up?)) and both book and raven flew up in surprise. The raven remained airborne, while the book sailed and landed with a dull 'thud' onto the floor.

Edward was glaring at the raven. 'Of all places, it HAD to fly into a library. AND pick on me.' She retrieved the book from the floor and tried to chase the flying creature away.

"Shoo!" she whispered. Though there was no one in her area of the library, she didn't want to be driven out in any case. "SHOO!"

The raven ducked sideways as she swung the book towards it. Squawking now, it landed on the table and started to shimmer. Edward stopped in surprise. However, at the dimming of the dazzling light, her face totally changed.

Shaking out his long and many strands of dark green hair, he stretched a little then plopped onto the seat where Edward had occupied earlier.

"Hello once again, O-chibi-san. Or… should I say, O-chibi-_chan._" Envy chuckled.

Not even bothering about noise now, Edward threw the book across the floor and charged straight at Envy. The Homunculus however, deftly caught her hand as she flew at him and quickly reversed the situation. Edward was now seated on Envy's lap.

"Now, now; no need to be that pleased to see me!" Envy chuckled all the more. He was positively grinning away as his theory proved right: the little alchemist was now weaker in physical strength. She could hardly get out of his grip. With a hand holding each of Edward's he made sure she wasn't able to transmute something into his face.

"I see that you've gone through some miraculous change! You look different!" Envy smirked. "You've even gotten your normal arm and leg back, from the feel of it." He added in a slight tone.

Edward kept struggling. 'No good; he's keeping my hands apart, and I can't even break free! What's going on? Has he grown stronger?' she thought desperately. Kicking his legs didn't seem to work; looked as if he didn't even feel the pain.

"Hahaha… It's useless, Hagane no. You being female certainly has several advantages… mine, that is." He brought his head down close to hers.

"Even for a kiss… can be considered an advantage, though you are my 'hunter'." He pecked her on the cheek. Edward froze in horror, then doubled her efforts in struggling. In the midst of it, Envy suddenly let go; and Ed kind of tumbled to the floor. Rolling away from Envy, she stood up and quickly rubbed her sleeve against her cheek, and by which her face was slightly red.

"Aww, do I sense embarrassment? Is Chibi-san blushing now?" He smirked. However, Ed was far from blushing. Sure, her face was red, but not from the embarrassment.

It was from anger.

In a flash, she sped towards Envy again. This time, when Envy tried to catch her, she dodged, and planted a kick right in the middle of her target's body. On the contrary, the kick hardly did any damage. In fact, Envy stood rooted onto the spot. Edward found herself slightly dazed and a few feet from Envy. She had ricocheted off him.

Envy slowly walked towards the alchemist, who was still seeing stars, but they were clearing up. Before she could do anything though, Envy knelt atop her and had her arms pinned to the side of her. She gave him the fiercest glare she could give, but Envy smiled at that.

"Now don't give me that look; why, I've enjoyed myself this afternoon, but I can't say I'm sure about you. What I AM sure is that this isn't over… I'll see you tonight, O-chibi-san." He released her arms and leapt off the window. A raven was seen flying off a moment later.

Edward sat up, but didn't stand. She kept hearing the words "I'll see you tonight…" over and over again, and kept thinking about how her attacks totally failed.

And the thought that she'll probably get killed tonight.

* * *

_Funnily enough, I decided to jump straight into this chapter. I really wanted to build up Roy and Ed's relationship, but just simply couldn't resist the temptation to type out the other chapters sooner or lose them completely later. Well, yes, I do have them written down but still? Maybe because I want to get it over and done with. After this chapter things may take a serious turn… maybe. I don't know what's the right word for it. So till' the next chapter then. Byez._


	11. Of Scheduled Meetings & What Not PTII

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Seriously.

_Heh heh… I had a little problem starting this chapter. I already know what's going to happen. The problem? I need to insert some things to link it all up… and that can prove to be tough. And, you are right, Shingo-sama. Poor, poor Edo-chan. She's gonna so get it this round. Though I don't mind being in her position with Roy, not Envy… OOPS! Spoiler. Argh. I'm spoiling my own story. Ok, let's go!

* * *

Chapter 11 Of Scheduled Meetings and What-Not…Part II_

The rest of the day carried on as normal… although the same cannot be said for the Colonel. As military officers have encountered, the little female alchemist-cum-Colonel was rather jumpy for the rest of the evening, and at every knock of the door was to have caused her to fall off her chair (as in, when they walk in, they always see her picking herself up) and that their conversations were short and quirky. However, Roy did not have the pleasure ((if I can say pleasure)) of seeing such an Ed. He, on the other hand, was busy preparing to organize a meeting of higher classes (not including Edward) and did not drop in (should actually say that he didn't bump into Ed, nor did **she** drop in on him) to see his Colonel for the whole day. With the meeting, it could be around… say, about 9pm that he should return back to the apartment.

Giving Envy ample time to drop by the flat anytime he wishes, thought Edward with a shiver. She had stacked all her paper work, completed, all signed and ready to hand in to Riza when she comes by; it was about 6pm. Time to leave.

Riza knocked on the door, causing Ed to, once again, jump up, and both feet literally left the floor completely. Riza walked in to find Edward painfully rubbing her bottom (that's what she landed on), and was a little wild at the eyes. After seeing to having the paperwork handed in, Edward bade the secretary good day, and left in a hurry. Riza's left eyebrow lifted; but she didn't speak a word. Instead, she walked back to the office where she noted that at least the young Colonel did her job… comparing to a certain someone who simply refuses to touch his paperwork at all…

Edward stood in front of the door to Roy's apartment. Just stood there. She had spent the whole day looking up the streets and into dark alleyways (only to find rats and stray cats) for any sign of someone hiding, though she found the cats and rats highly suspicious as well, and gave it up entirely by scuttling back to where she was right now.

Standing there, key in hand, she stared. And stared at the wooden door. Her hand fell and she placed her ear against the door, listening.

Nothing.

She stared for a moment longer, and then took in a deep breath, plunged the key in. She left it there, hand hanging from the protruding key. Then she steeled herself; squinting her eyes shut, she twisted the key and opened the door wide. She opened her eyes and peered into the house. Empty living room, kitchen… all the other rooms were vacant as well.

No one there.

She quickly looked to her left and right outside, then hurried in and locked the door shut. Turning her back and leaning against the door, she slid down with eyes closed again and heaved a sigh of relief. Envy probably had something on… and hopefully he was only jesting about what he said.

She opened her eyes once more; they were full of determination, as she gave a last thought of not letting her guard down, when something rumbled.

This time, she didn't jump; placing her hand over her tummy, she glanced at the clock. 7.15pm. HIIIGH time for dinner. She went into the kitchen and fixed herself dinner to eased her grumbling tummy. As she remembered, Roy won't be back till' late. And in any case, he can't even cook…

* * *

_Shall we stop here? I was wondering whether I should… hmm…_

_But that would be evil, nee?_

_Hmm…_

_But I really want to call the next chapter something else… haha! So I'll just leave it here! And I know it's short… Oh-ho ho. I AM evil. ((hops away))_


	12. Let Me Help You Erase the Pain Please

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I assure everyone that FMA is not mine.

_Now we continue. It's funny. I wrote chapter 11 on a certain day, and then posted it like, 5 days after that. I mean, what's the meaning of my laptop then? Haha… but in any case, I'm still writing at least. For this one, I have a new title. I don't know whether it's going to be long or not, because I may decide to stop halfway… Should I do so again? Hee-hee. We'll see…

* * *

_

Chapter 12 Let Me Help You Erase the Pain… Please…

A nice, hot bath seemed to calm her down, and Edward was now lounged on the sofa (she had just cleaned it up from the previous night's coffee stains), totally relaxed.

Well, not totally. Her eyes maybe closed, but her ears were all at attention to detect the slightest noise. However, the only thing that she could hear was the clock ticking away on the wall… The clock was soon ticking in time to her heart beating… and then her breathing…

_CLICK._

That sound jerked her awake, and imagine her surprise when the whole apartment was all dark, except for the moonlight shining.

Not to mention shining on the silhouette seated at the window.

Leaping up, she snarled and lunged for the shadowy figure, who quickly jumped aside and landed with a very heavy 'thump' on the floor behind her. In the dim light she caught him smirking, and dodged just quickly enough as it was his turn to charge at her.

Landing on the sofa, she almost flew off it again as the springs beneath her feet uncoiled. Caught off-guard just then, she could not help uttering a cry as her assailant slammed into her and she flew into the wall. The attacker bounced away from the wall in time, though Edward managed to hit the wall with her back, and not her head.

Which meant that all her breath got knocked out from her lungs, and for a moment the sick feeling of floating in the air came to her. She had just managed to breathe again, when a hand closed around her throat and lifted her up the wall, until her feet were dangling a few inches of the floor.

"…Blast you… Envy… Let… me go…" she spluttered and croaked out, all the while trying to kick out at the homunculus.

Envy chuckled, giving no indication to the kicks his was receiving. When he stopped, he was smirking again.

"What if I say no?"

Kicks getting weaker, Edward had no choice but to stop. Struggling to break free of the grip around her throat, she tried to pry the fingers halving her air supply. Envy chuckled again.

"It's useless, o-chibi-chan! You can never over-power me, never." His grip tightened. What fun it was to see the little pip-squeak, gasping for air, totally powerless. Humans. Utter weaklings they are.

Edward's face was slowly turning blue. With the last of her will power, she managed to clap her hands together and slap them against the wall. Envy's face quickly changed from grinning to snarling as two brick fists slammed into his chest, sending him flying this time.

Just as he got up, he was hit again by protruding wooden blocks; from the floor this time. 'She recovers fast… little minx…' and he lunged at her, this time avoiding spikes from the floor. He crashed into the surprised alchemist, who couldn't dodge in time.

They flew across the floor, right into the moonlit area just by the window. Edward was utterly winded; that was the second time she lost all the air in her lungs. That being nothing to Envy, he hoisted himself above her and pinned her down, arms and legs. He thought he saw a glimpse of despair flash across her eyes, but they seemingly disappeared as she struggled against his weight. Chuckling once again, he said in a soft, sneering tone right into her ear, "I told you it's useless; I'm now more powerful than you, chibi-chan. And… OH no you don't!" he stopped Edward's hand as she had picked up a small part of the wooden flooring and was scratching a transmutation circle beside them.

Edward could not possibly reach for anymore; they were all too far away, and then she stopped struggling. Throwing her fiercest look at Envy, she spat, "Well, I can't do anything else; Kill me then. I bet you've been waiting to do that for so long now…"

Envy chuckled all the more. When he finally stopped, he gave her his most amused look (which still probably looked more like a sneer than anything) and said, "Since when did I say I'd kill you, o-chibi-chan? Did you hear those words from my mouth then?"

He spotted something else other that his finger marks around Edward's throat, and then he smirked.

"Looks like someone's been up to some hanky-panky too, huh? Is it with that half-wit of a replacement? Eeew… haven't you considered his age yet? He's definitely about twice your age… though mine should be about quadruple…" He snorted, then leaned down till' they were nose to nose.

"…Too bad your _darling _Fuhrer ain't here to interrupt us… I'll just take full advantage of the situation, shall I?" And he lowered his head further to kiss Edward full on the lips.

Edward was too stunned. She froze in horror as the lips of the homunculus took hers, until her anger kicked in that she turned her head away. She earned a slap for that though, as Envy took both her hands into one of his, leaving the other hand free to strike his palm across her cheek.

"I never slapped; I reckon fists should do the actual talking, but you should really stop trying to struggle against me. I've already said that it's useless." He used his free hand to hold her head in place and continued to kiss her, harder this time.

Edward winced. First of all, Roy would never, NEVER do this to her (would he?) and Roy would never kiss her this hard either. The sharp teeth that Envy possessed didn't do much to help either. In fact, when he bit on her lower lip to gain entrance, she was positive that the lip was bleeding, though she didn't taste the familiar metal-like taste of the red substance. When she didn't relent, he broke apart again.

"Look, I found the resistance from you fun, but ONLY in fighting. Will you cut this out? I wonder if all pip-squeaks are like you…" He tried again, this time biting harder on her lip. She relented, and was shocked to find how… un-human like his tongue was. It wasn't even warm; in fact, his body was a few degrees colder than hers. Proof that he simply isn't human.

And his tongue… simply too long. She almost choked when he slid his tongue in, but he didn't push down her throat that's for sure. It could definitely reach there.

Envy was enjoying himself. Here was his best foe, and he, for once, had total power over the alchemist. Though he knew who he ought to thank for transmuting his foe into what she was now, he definitely won't stoop to that level. No, thanking someone, ANYONE, was simply out of the question.

He decided to take it once step further. Without breaking the kiss, his hand released her face and slowly started to unbutton her shirt.

Poor Edward. She couldn't do a single thing. Now that Envy's tongue was in her mouth, she couldn't pull away at all, no matter how hard she tried. She screwed her eyes tight as her shirt came unbuttoned…

* * *

Time: 10.42pm. Roy tucked his pocket watch into his right pocket and then reached into the other with his left hand for his keys. Fumbling with them, he actually dropped them once before being able to fit the correct one into the slot. Though after he opened the door and took his keys out of the door did he drop them again. The house didn't seem right. For one, the lights should still be on. He flicked them on. And didn't stoop to pick up the keys, which he was what he wanted to do. He gasped. 

His floor was torn in different places; the wall suddenly had two arms and were frozen in the act of punching someone, whereas in between the two arms lay a big crack where something must have smashed into it pretty hard. The sofa was over-turned by the floor, and… was that…? Just lying by the window…

The top of Edward's shirt, a little torn and dust covered.

Roy blinked, then took in a deep breath to remain calm. He assumed that the… er… the extra features of his living room came as a result of Ed's alchemy in attempt to defend herself if that was the situation, and that it should be no problem, since alchemy was her strong point.

Then why, of all things, was her shirt lying torn and dusty on the floor? The window was open; the cool air blew in and disturbed the shirt on the floor. Had Edward jumped out of the apartment to pursue the attacker?

No, he crossed that out. For one, Ed would definitely NOT run around with her shirt off. Second, this was the second floor. If she still had her auto-mail limbs, she would have jumped out right away. Besides, the attacker would probably think twice about breaking a bone or two. And last of all, the most obvious one: who in the world would attack her, right here in his apartment? Burglars were totally out of the question: his house barely had any antiques or valuable items worth stealing. A burglar would be very disappointed and for the first time in his burglar's life, walk away empty-handed. So…

Where was Ed? And what the hell happened?

He stooped to pick up the shirt, and just then caught a sound other than the quiet ticking of the clock, one of the few things that escaped unscathed from the unknown fray. It sounded… like it was the shower. Was Edward in the shower? But what a time! And, judging from the shirt that he was holding, she had probably bathed earlier already. So what's she doing in the very, very cold shower?

He walked quietly towards the sound; the bathroom in his room. Funny. She never used his bathroom before. She always used the one in the kitchen.

As he approached his room, he realised that she didn't even lock the toilet door. It was wide open. Not wanting to intrude, he knocked on his own door to alert her his presence and cleared his throat.

"Er-hem… Edward? Are you alright? What are you doing bathing at this hour? And by the way, what happened?"

Silence, except for the water running. No response at all, whatever.

Roy took a tentative step towards the bathroom, and spoke again.

"Ed? Are you alright?" He took another step, then another, and more steps till' he reached the open bathroom. Still no response.

He didn't know whether to worry that Ed was either hurt or unconscious, whatever, inside, or that he should just walk in to check whether there was anybody there in the first place. It could have been that Edward was bathing halfway when she got attacked… but that wouldn't really explain how her shirt would get so torn and dirty…

Risking it, he stuck his head slightly into the bathroom and looked to the left.

True enough, the teen girl was inside. But at the sight of her, Roy panicked. She was on sort of seated on the floor, water running from the shower to have her all wet through. She didn't even bother to take off her bottoms; which was all she had actually. Her head was bent low, water running off her hair, which was rather messed up. Braid wasn't even loosen. And… was she? Scrubbing away at something.

It wasn't until Roy approached her carefully did he notice what she was scrubbing. It was her left arm. And she had scrubbed so hard, it was actually red and bleeding slightly. She still didn't notice him.

"ED!" Roy shouted and rushed to her. She still didn't notice him.

He took her by the shoulders and gave a good shake, and was shocked. The water was cold. Very cold. She still didn't notice him. Roy was horrified. As he looked into her face, he was deeply aware that her eyes… her eyes…

Were terribly blank and opened wide.

He gave a small cry, then turned off the shower before snatching a big towel from the towel rack. He wrapped the towel around the soaked and shivering girl and hauled her off the floor. This was easy; even with wet clothes, she was still considerably light.

* * *

She was shivering in the cold. It was raining… and somehow she had managed to get herself very dirty and slimy. She panicked, not knowing where and how she got there, and tried her hardest to remove the dirt and grime. But no matter how hard she scrubbed, the stains just won't go away. There was one thing floating through her mind though; it repeated itself over and over: Envy. She found herself getting dirtier and dirtier, and scrubbed all the more to remove the grime, but it was getting worse. 

Just then something wrapped around her; with a start, thinking it was Envy, she started screaming.

* * *

"Edward!" Roy sank to his knees. 

She was screaming and thrashing about in the towel that he had wrapped around her; in order not to drop her, he sank to the floor and tried to shake her out of her trance. She was still screaming things, like "Let me go!" and "No more!"

Positively shocked, Roy tried shaking harder, using his voice to jerk her out of it.

"Ed! Edward! Come on! You're alright! Snap out of it! ED!" With the last word he hugged her firmly so as to stop her from struggling.

Amazingly, she did. Stop, that is. He peeled her away from his body; now his clothes were damp. Looking into her eyes, he saw with relief that the golden eyes were no longer blank, but they still looked wild. She was panting; her bleeding arm now staining his towel. But she didn't notice. She didn't even seem to recognise him as yet.

He used a hand to push one of her bangs, almost in her eyes, out of the way, then said to her in a soft, soothing voice, "Ed… It's me, Roy. Are you ok? What happened? Tell me."

A spark of recognition flashed in the golden orbs, as they started moving in their sockets to take in the face she was seeing. At last, she managed to fix her eyes on his black ones, and croaked, "…Roy…?"

Before he could nod or respond, she had thrown her arms around him and was shaking in his embrace. She was mumbling something; but speaking into his chest did not help make the words clearer. He heard things like "him", "came" and "could do nothing", and pulled her away.

"What are you saying? I couldn't hear…" he searched her eyes. They still looked wild, but it was better than being blank.

Edward was still shaking; tears were about to spill, but miraculously she could hold back the tears from flowing. Roy sighed; Edward needed to cry sometimes, and should let the tears go. But she always didn't.

"…It… it was… E-Envy… He… he came…"

She broke off as Roy hissed in a sharp intake of breath. "Envy, you say? What did he want? Did he do anything to you? Are you hurt? You fought him back, right?" He remembered the alchemical transmutations in his living room.

To his greatest alarm, her held back tears finally flowed; she hung her head low, not wanting Roy to see them and was now shaking harder than ever.

"…I tried… I fought… but he was… was too quick… he caught me… and… and…" She tried to continue, but the memory of it itself was far too painful. She broke off there, causing Roy to lift her face and question her, "What did he do?"

She stifled a sob; being unable to continue speaking, she pulled off a bit of the towel to emphasise her point. Roy actually snarled at what he saw. All across her shoulder were bite-marks – the homunculus had left them all over. By the look of it, though Envy may not have noticed, the bite-marks look rather painful; some were actually puncture wounds that were caused by sharp teeth. Roy painfully noted that Edward had been assaulted; he caught her in an embrace again, hoping that it would ease her shaking.

She was talking again; as she shaking subsided, she was talking into his chest, but he heard what she was trying to say.

"…I couldn't … couldn't do anything… I tried… can't… can't break free… held my arms… couldn't do alchemy… couldn't fight back… couldn't…" Then, as if a bit of anger spread through her, she started thumping her fist on him.

"WHY! I couldn't do anything! Is it because I'm like this? …No… I don't want to remain like this…I hate this… Change me back… CHANGE ME BACK!" She started sobbing again, and Roy grimaced as waves of guilt washed and slammed into him, as she continued to thump her fist on him.

"…Why… why am I like this… I… I don't know what I'm doing… why am I doing this…" her thumping grew weaker, and Roy caught her fist in his hand, then hugged her all the tighter.

It was his fault of course. He was the one responsible. The guilt in his stomach was so great, he felt like puking. But he knew he had to do something, something in return. He needed to protect the now vulnerable alchemist in his arms.

He pulled her away from him again; her head was hung low, and he lifted her face to look at him. The tears were still flowing; he used his thumb to wipe away the wet streaks across her cheeks. As he looked into those saddened and pained eyes of hers, he made up his mind. He had to do something.

"Ed…" he brushed the other bang out of her eye. "…Will you… will you let me erase your pain?"

* * *

_LOL. I was typing this chapter halfway when I received the review alert from Shingo-sama. Man, you are VERY fast. Or do you actually stay online all the time? Haha…_

_And sorry, I realised I HAD to break off here. TOO LONG! I was thinking of making it a one chapter thing, but I realised if I continue to write, what with descriptions and everything, it's gonna hit 15 pages or over. I definitely don't want that. Besides, people should be happy; it is already 8 pages long! So… until the next chapter then. Poor, poor Ed… . _


	13. Let Me Help You Erase the Pain Please II

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I seriously, SERIOUSLY don't own FMA. Everyone would kill me if I did.

_Wow. Hey people guess what. I'm typing this in a car! Fetching my bro back to the army, and since it's a long journey, why not? Haha. Rather do this then get carsick or sleep in the car. _

_Ok. I admit, to some, this chapter may not be as hot (I rarely read very sexual active books) but to me, it's enough to make me blush like the reddest tomato you've ever seen (remember the incident from before?). So… yar… haha. Here goes.

* * *

_

Chapter 13 Let Me Help You Erase the Pain… Please… Part II

'"_Ed…" he brushed the other bang out of her eye. "…Will you… will you let me erase your pain?"'_

Edward stopped crying then. She slowly pulled away from her embracer, and looked at him full in the face. Why… was that the look of guilt in his eyes?

Roy reached out once again to mop away the streaks of tears from her cheeks. Just as he looked at her with guilt ((yes, it truly was showing)), she looked back at him, eyes turning from sadness and pain to questioning and confuse.

He knew his methods would cause another brutal blow to her emotional scar (as if Envy's weren't enough) but it was to only way to help her forget about Envy…

And simply remember him; them, instead.

In response to her questioning look, he cured her confusion by kissing her gently on the lips. Her golden eyes widened, and her whole body shook. But it was only temporary; why, just after about 5 seconds, she completely relaxed and kissed him back as well. Roy was comforted by the fact that she didn't react emotionally to that. He was afraid that kissing or anything more intimacy would bring her mind back to Envy. However here she was calmly kissing him back, and her shivering had totally stopped.

Was it the kiss? Does his kiss calm her down? Make her at ease? He thought about this in wonder, then pulled out of the kiss and the thought. He looked at her to see if she was really alright with it.

Edward was slowly opening her eyes after their lips broke apart. Gone from her eyes were the pain, confuse and what not. She was just gazing into his eyes, though clearly thinking about what Roy had in mind. It was a kind of serious look, almost as if just asking whether he was sure about it.

Roy kissed her on the forehead, and replied, "…If you are willing, we can go more than that… I simply don't want to hurt you any further than what … what had happened." He didn't even dared to say his name, though he knew that Edward knew who he was referring to. Her eyes dimmed again, but they were also thinking about Roy's request.

In the end, she leaned against his chest again; huddling in his warmth, she nodded.

At the inclining of her head, Roy picked her up and carried her over to the bed. He set her down on his comfy mattress, then proceeded to dry her down. Her hair was kind of dripping, so he didn't really want his bed wet. The towel was soaked, both with water and a bit in blood; her arm! He almost forgot about that. As soon as he had dried her (not really of any effect, because the towel was already soaking wet) he stood up and wanted to head for the kitchen for the second drawer, where he knew a roll of bandage lay. But he didn't manage to walk away at all, for a hand grasped his arm.

"…Don't leave me alone anymore… don't leave me here…" she whispered, towel still around her, head hanging.

Roy was ashamed. Here he wanted to help her, and there he almost left her alone without his company again. What was he doing? But then again, if the blood won't stop flowing, that would be disastrous. He knelt down in front of her ((sorry, I don't wanna spoil the mood, but he definitely wasn't gonna propose … … not yet anyway. He's on both knees here.)) and took her arm to examine it.

Either her nails were very sharp and long, or she had really scratched rather hard back in the bathroom. The wound looked pretty deep, and also had the impression that it seriously won't stop bleeding. He HAD to do something.

Though that was quickly answered when Edward pulled her arm out of his; wincing slightly, she held it up in front of his face as if to question, 'About this?' and then turned to the side, clapped her hands and slapped them onto his bed. A strip of long cloth emerged from the bed-sheet; wordlessly, she handed it to him.

Roy actually had to stare at the transmuted bed-sheet before actually gently taking her arm and bandaging it up. He just couldn't believe that in all that kind of mood, she was still able to perform alchemy… she sure can be strong sometimes. Though, this was a very weird time to express it. He half didn't know when the next bout of tears would flow again.

After tying the bandage, he took another look at her. Her bottoms were soaking the side of the bed already. That wouldn't do. He had to get them OFF.

He scooped her up ((literally)) and carefully climbed into his bed where he gently placed her down in the middle and placed himself atop of her. As expected, he saw her eyes widen with fear and shock; this scene definitely happened with Envy.

It pained him to see her like this; he quickly kissed her on the forehead again, and true enough, when he looked down at her after that, she was relaxed again. His kisses really were something. He thought about for a moment before shaking his head and asking her one last time, hand going down to the pants, "I'll stop if you want, when you can't take it. Just say the word and I will. I really, really don't want to hurt you anymore."

Edward couldn't say. Earlier on, fear gripped her heart when she found herself once again in that same position. And for a single moment, she thought it really was Envy again, but it wavered into Roy's face; and with his kiss, her fears were abolished. She looked at Roy's face, and saw the pain in his eyes.

The more she thought about it, the more resolute she became. In any case, he was trying to help, and she was… well, to say the least, curious. She gave him a feeble smile, then reached out for neck and pulled him down to kiss her on the lips, giving him the answer.

Without breaking the connection, he slipped the pants off her, and coaxed her to remove his clothes. After the pants and his attire were strewn across the floor, he got down to serious business, though not after he pulled off the ribbon that held her hair. At first he limited the kisses to her face, then, steeling himself, he moved down, knowing that there may still be some kind of shock.

What he didn't expect was to be pushed away. Her two hands on his chest, lifting him from her, Edward's eyes were all opened wide and full of fear. Because Roy had kissed the neck; the area where most of the bite marks were located. It totally freaked her out.

Roy's chest ached. It really, really pained him to see her like this. If he ever got hold of Envy… oh no. There's definitely no telling what he would do to that son of a…

He gently took her right hand (so as to make sure he'd get her attention; they were on the verge of going blank, and her right hand is something close to being new: she hasn't used it to feel every since she got the auto-mail) and brought it to his cheek. Her eyes cleared.

Kissing her hand, he breathed into it, "It's me, Roy. It's Roy alright? Don't worry. Forget everything else, and remember only me." As a reassurance, he kissed her again, on the lips, then broke apart.

Edward calmed down in his kiss. Breathing slowly this time (she was actually taking in sharp breaths earlier) she forced herself to look into his face. Every inch of the face before hers was Roy. Totally Roy. Not Envy… not Envy. She tried not to think of him, and instead replaced her thoughts solely on the face in front of her. Roy, who would not hurt her. Roy, who said he wanted to help her.

Roy, who loved her?

Definitely. She nodded her head in response, then kissed him in apology.

When he was sure that she was all ok, he started again. From her neck, he made his way down, raining kisses wherever he could, though when he reached the chest area, he actually settled for licking and suckling on her breasts. It made her moan, and Roy was content with that. After all, this was her first time.

In the past, those women he had were just a way of releasing his tension. But this one is a special case… No way is he ever going to let her go. Not like others. Not like others…

He rained more kisses, then contemplated about Doing It. It seemed… too rushed. But on the other hand, he didn't want Envy (should he appear again) to take it away from her first… he wanted to be her first.

However, he needed her to be at her most relaxed state. He kissed her again, and let his hands roam. When he felt her hands roaming his body, he knew that it was time. He propped himself higher and gave her a serious look. She returned him a similar one.

Taking one hand in his, he carefully moved into position. Edward's face was unreadable, though she closed her eyes as Roy steadied himself.

Roy took another look at Edward, eyes closed and bracing herself. He almost thought about forgetting the whole thing, but in the end he decided to take the plunge, and pushed into her. However, he didn't expect her reaction to be as such…

Edward felt a jolt of pain. Eyes flipped opened wide, she actually writhed a little. She gripped Roy's hand hard, and also grasped a handful of the bed-sheet to stop herself from crying out. She bit on her lower lip as well.

But then, she really couldn't take it any longer. Trying her last bit to bite down harder on her lip, she gave up and let out a cry of pain.

Roy stopped in surprise and slid out. He was slightly alarmed; he expected moans, not a cry of pain. Taking a look at the problem, he only found her in slight grimace and taking shallow breaths.

'Maybe she wasn't relaxed enough…' he thought silently. Though that really wasn't the case… Truth was… _his _appendage was large… taking in mind that Edward _is _rather small in size… no wonder she'd be in pain anyways.

He used his other hand sweep the bang (which fell over her eye again) to the side, then asked, "Are you alright? If you can't take this, I won't push you any further."

Still breathing shallow and fast, she shook her head. Then she gave a look that clearly stated, "Carry on."

He was kind of reluctant at that, but in any case he lowered himself into her again. Edward's breath hitched as she felt him slide in, and there the pain came again. He really was too big.

Roy, sensing that she was in pain again, quickly sealed their lips together, hoping that would make her more relaxed and enjoy more instead of experiencing the pain.

It worked. Edward sighed inwardly as the pain slowly gave way to pleasure, and Roy, tension also released, began to set the pace. Their lips still joined, she could manage muffled sounds into his mouth. She guessed it made him content enough, because she felt the corners of his mouth curl up slightly when she let the sounds escape from her.

All in all, they probably did it like, five to seven times. Edward completely lost count after the third round. In fact, both were enjoying themselves too much to care. After the last round, Roy was completely drained. Now both were panting as if they've ran a marathon together, and he mustered just enough energy to give her a warm ((not to mention wet and sticky)) embrace, and whispered into her ear.

"I swear I won't let you get hurt again; what ever it takes me, I'll protect you with all that I've got. Even if it looks as if I can't, I'll try. I…" He broke off… how embarrassing to confess in a situation like this. But here goes anyway.

"… I… I love you, Ed." He broke off again, and continued. "Too much till' it hurts me to see you hurt. That's why… no more –"

Edward stopped his words with a single finger on his lips. She knew what he was going to say, but couldn't decide whether or not to hear it. She knew… oh for sure now, since it came straight from his mouth, that he loved her. Did she feel the same way? She was hot for his form, and she still didn't know why. But… he was so sincere about the whole thing… And he knew her condition… Was it right? Was is really alright? She couldn't answer.

Instead, she gave him a kiss which seemed to pacify him a little. The answer to that would have to wait… though she knew what it was. She _just_ wanted to make him wait. Let that serve as a bit of punishment.

Roy was totally exhausted. Doing it that many times sure drains the energy. He collapsed beside her, and they both lay panting for a moment. Then, he felt her turn to his side, threw her right arm around his side, and nuzzled into his chest. He smiled, then placed his own arm across her, and brought his nose down to her hair.

There they both lay; Edward breathing in his scent, and Roy taking in the flowery smile of her hair. Both slept, while listening to the sound of each other's heartbeats.

* * *

_Finally… oh God. I think I can kill myself. Rather, I think my mum can just do that if she reads what I've just written. Anyways, I didn't write everything in the car, for goodness sake. I stopped about halfway through this chapter, because typing in the car gives the tummy the wobbles. Eesh. Anyway, I'd try to see whether I can type the next chapter as soon as possible. If I can… because school term is starting soon again . Boo hoo. I'll try. Hope you all enjoyed this one… haha._


	14. Emergency Visits

Totally Screwed Transmutation

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. That's final. (Do I have to repeat myself every time?)

_Hello… like, I haven't actually recovered from the last chapter yet you know. What's with the rush? LOL. Never mind. I AM kind. No, really. Hahah! Sigh…_

_This chapter won't be much, since I just finished up the earlier chapter this morning. And now… sigh. I have to start typing again. Let's get on with it shall we?

* * *

_

Chapter 14 Emergency Visits

A ray of light fell across her face. She stirred a little. Funny... the bed wasn't as soft as usual. She opened her eye, partly due to half of her face stuck onto what seemed like flesh. Her face lifted a little, but did not leave contact at all. The chest heaved slightly, then fell back again.

She was sprawled half-way across someone's chest, her injured arm cradled near her and her other arm laid across the chest as well. As she stirred more, removing her face from the warmth, she felt a hand slide down from her back onto the bed next to her. She slowly turned up to face the calm face, breathing slowly in a deep sleep. Smiling, she made a move to stroke the side of his face, then his hair.

She lifted her hand away as black eyes opened slowly to look at her. Blinking the dust out of his eyes, Roy raised his hand to rub at them. With the other hand, the one next to her, he used it to rake through her soft, golden hair.

"Morning, little one."

Smiling as that managed to make her frown, he stretched himself. At least she was somewhat back to normal, though he couldn't be too sure. From her eyes he could sense some kind of veil and a cover. He definitely needed to observe her carefully these few days.

She was still frowning, and almost made to get up from the bed when he held her back and asked, "Why, no morning kiss? That's not fair, isn't it? Surely I earned one?"

Edward frowned slightly harder, then pouted her lips. He was right of course. Reluctantly, she heaved herself closer to Roy's face and planted her kiss on his cheek. Now it was his turn to frown.

"What? Not here?" And with a sudden pull on her chin, he pressed their lips together.

They remained like that for what seemed like minutes, then finally broke apart. Roy gave her a look that kind of said 'That's better', then turned to look at the alarm clock, which just started ringing.

"How accurate we are today." He said. "Come on, let's get ready for another long day at the office." He slid out of the bed and walked towards his wardrobe.

Edward now stretched, and gave a long yawn. Now more awake after the wake-up kiss, she peeled back the blanket covering her and for a moment stared at the dark, red patch on the mattress just near her.

Oh yar, and she screamed. Very loudly.

Roy jerked his head back, cracking it in the process. As he rubbed his pained neck and hurried towards her, with half his shirt on, he questioned her in alarm.

"What's going on? What is it?"

She clung to him then pointed at the bloody mess on the bed. Shuddering, she pulled herself away and examined herself to see whether she was bleeding, then turned to him to examine him whether _he_ was alright.

Roy looked from the mess to Edward checking them fervently, then back to the bed again. Then, he tossed his head back and laughed.

Edward stared at him in surprise. Here she was worried that something might have happened, and there he goes laughing about it?

"I don't… I don't think this is a laughing matter!" She huffed at him.

Roy was suppressing his laughter, now reduced to muffled chuckles. He sat down on the bed next to her, and ruffled her hair.

"Heh heh heh… no need to worry, Ed-chan." She frowned at that. "All the blood," he pointed at the red spot in the middle of the bed, "came from you. And no," he added quickly, for she stared back at him in horror, "you are not hurt in anyway. That was SUPPOSED to happen."

Seeing the look of disbelief in her eyes, he sighed, but was grinning as he told her what happened to female 'first-timers'. He was about to laugh out loud again when he saw her reaction: wide open eyes, dropped jaw and blush – all at the same time.

Edward stared at herself. Out of the sake of appearance, she had draped the blanket around her again. From her… God. Then it hit her. Roy had stolen her chastity!

She swiped a pillow at him, both for the stealing and the laughing. He ducked the first one, and, because he was really laughing now, he ate the second shot straight in the face.

"Ow… Ah come on. We gotta get to work already." He got up and was about to head for the bathroom when Edward asked, "…But… but what about the stains?"

He turned back to blink at her. He forgot about that already?

"…Guess you are right. Come on, we'll dump it in the washers."

She got up from the bed, but had to drop to her knees again when she took a few steps. Roy looked at her with curiosity.

"Are you alright? I'm sure you can walk, right?" He extended his hand and helped her up. Though, after that she found her limping and gritting her teeth as she made her way to her room.

He looked her in question. "Are you sure you are alright?"

She turned around and gave him a glare. "It's because of you, duh! I mean…" She looked down and blushed. "… It's because… it's because… YOU are 'BIG'!" And she blushed even harder.

Now it was his turn to feel the heat rise up to his cheeks. Seeing the reason behind the limping, he quickly ducked into the toilet ((not to check! Good gracious)) and he got on with his daily necessities.

XXX

Back in the office, Roy was seated at his desk, pondering what he should do about working time. Since he and Edward have separate offices, and that she can't stay in his office at all times, and that ordering guards to stand by her door would pose questions, AND that he can't go to her…

Hang on. He CAN go to her office and stay there! With a PERFECT reason to. Grinning, he got up from his office (he actually managed to complete his work within the first half of the day; that was never ever heard of with him) and informed his guards and Riza (after handing in the paper work; she was stunned) that he was going to do…

XXX

"…An inspection, Sir?" Edward asked in salute. Roy replied grinning at his colonel.

"Yes, Colonel. An inspection." He walked to her files behind her and started looking through them… apparently.

"So… are you alright there, Edward?" he popped the question while looking for another file to browse. He looked at her from the corner of his eyes and saw her bent down over her paperwork. He frowned. She sure doesn't care about respect at all. Though, in this case, it didn't really matter anymore. Besides, she was supposed to work while he 'inspected'.

Edward looked up from her paperwork and looked at him with an irritated look.

"Of course I am, _sir_." She had said that with an emphasis; reminding him that they were after all still at work. If 'that' was what he wanted.

Roy placed the file back in the shelf, and walked round to her and gave her a hug. He felt her jump in her seat and almost chuckled when she turned to him and said, "What are you doing? What if someone comes in?"

He decided to ignore that and refused to let go. After sometime, he turned the chair round so that they faced each other, and gently held her arms.

"Silly. I'm worried about you of course. No worries about anyone coming in; as if anyone would when the Fuhrer is doing an inspection." He smirked, then winked. "A brilliant idea, no? Since there literally is no other way you can possibly stay in my office for the whole day, and neither can I place guards at your door. I don't want to anyway," he said with a hint of mischief in his voice. "So, I decided that the inspection can take the whole if I wanted to." He then pointed to the shelves of files behind her. "Besides, there are so many files here, inspection would cover several days, right?"

Edward gave him a puzzled look. Why was he doing this? She was perfectly fine on her own… or perhaps a little paranoid, though not as serious as the day before. And… yar. She just didn't feel like talking to anyone else at the moment.

Since the morning she stepped in, whoever she encountered with were greeted with very few words. Orders were brief, and the personnel were quickly dismissed. She didn't care if they thought she was all drawn in. She… she just didn't want to talk to anybody. Or… perhaps just him would be fine. And… and maybe Al…

She missed her brother, and it wasn't very long that she got to see him in his original state. Why, just for 2 weeks, only 2 weeks at Rizenboul, and then she (he at that time) had to head back for office.

Roy saw her look of puzzlement turn distant, realizing that Edward probably needed some kind of help. Something that he couldn't do. What did she need? Family? Yar, that probably was it. The only thing she would miss all in the world would be her dearest brother, the one in which she had so painstakingly waited all years to finally fulfill the dream of turning him back to normal.

Thinking of calling at the Rockbell's residence later, he pulled her out of the chair and into a hug.

"Edward, don't you remember that I promised I'll protect you? I'm so not going to leave you alone in this office until I'm sure that you are safe from any… any kind of attack." He concluded lamely. But that seemed to have done ther trick. Edward was stiff for a moment, then hugged him back and nuzzled her head into his chest.

"Ow."

She pulled back and rubbed her cheek. Roy gave her a look.

She pointed at the number of badges on the front of his military uniform. "These jabbed my cheek." She gave him a smile. "Thank you."

He returned one, then left her to her work and continued to… well, continued to 'look' through the files. Just before the day concluded for them at the military, he went back to his office, asking Edward to wait for a bit. Walking to Riza's empty desk (she had left shortly before both of them decided to leave) he picked up the receiver and had the operator put him through the line.

"…"

"…Hello?"

"Hello. Rockbell's residence? This is the Fuhrer, Mustang here…"

XXX

Third day after the Envy incident. Military officers who encountered Edward now reported saying that the Colonel seemed to have this distant look in her eyes. Answers and orders were still short, and she missed most of the meetings. Roy couldn't manage to conduct an inspection today, as there was another important meeting to attend to. However, _they_ promised to be here by today, so he hoped they turned up soon…

XXX

Back in her office, Edward was now seated at the desk, sifting through the documents before her. Absent-mindedly she noted to herself that this was probably why Roy (she had adjusted to the first name thing) had hated all these in the first place. There simply was too much to read.

After browsing through what seemed to be like the hundredth document, she put her head down to rest. Roy didn't come in for today. In her mind, she thought thankfully that he didn't; there were so many papers today because they were carried forward from yesterday. Roy's inspection turned to be more of a disturbance, and although she appreciated his company, she thought that it was more of a hindrance.

For today, she half-minded that he wasn't here. The other half was thinking… thinking how nice it would be if Al was here. Al would, of course, advice her in that sweet nature of his that it would probably be better if she just got on with her work, and finish it in one go, though at the same time saying that she shouldn't force herself. Why, she could almost hear him saying that to her in person.

"Nii-san, if you are working too hard, you should take a break you know. "

Edward's head jerked up. The door to her office was still left open. And there, standing by it…

Was Al.

She started from her chair in disbelief.

"… …Al?"

* * *

_Ha… I'm actually typing it in the car again. This time, I decided to stop because I am damn tired. The laptop's always getting some kinda crazy virus and it totally lags the system… if someone can help me…_

_So Al is finally here to save the day! Oh, and not to mention Winry too. Wait… where IS that girl? Oh ho, you'll see. In any case, I decided to do some reviewer's response today! So here we go!_

_**Cathelina**: I did, I did. _

_**Shingo-sama**: Hmmm… but I definitely need some more tips. Care to share?_

_**Doryaki**: Yup. Poor Edward indeed._

_**Animelvr4evr**: Cool. And hi-five. Looks like mums are alike in just about every place._

_**AnimeDutchess**: Pregnancy… HAHA! Not from this night, but I assure that it WILL happen! So keep reading!_


	15. Emergency Visits Unwanted?

Totally Screwed Transmutation

_Since everyone knows the disclaimer, I won't bother saying it anymore. But just in case, this is the last, LAST time that I'll be saying it: I do not own FMA at all! So there._

_Right now I'm sitting at home and typing. Later… maybe I'll be typing in the car. But by then, I'll have to separate it with an author's note to let people know where I started from. Haha_

_Ok. So let's start from where it was left off. Erm… so Al and Winry are finally here! Can Al help Ed just in a little way? Surprise surprise… maybe it's not Al who will bring Ed back to her normal self, but someone else…?_

_But before that… reviewer responses!_

_**AnimeDutchess – **Al doesn't know. That's why he… ah, you'll see._

_**Cathelina – **Yup. He's already human. I described this in the earlier chapters, especially the one where by Edward dreams about it. ". . ." You sure you know what happens to female first-timers?_

_**Animelvr4evr – **...Erm … What's bipolar?_

_**Shingo-sama – **Haha… no no. No Elricest in here. Not that I can't stand it, but I'd rather not have it in my story. Speaking of which though, I found a very nice Elricest story at Scimitar.Smile archives. It's by 3 different authors, the main author being kathia or something like that. The story has 3 parts: 'Embodied', 'Precious Things' and the last one, 'Blue Skies'. It's really really nice. If you can't find it, then tell me and I'll give you the links. _

_

* * *

_

Chapter 15 Emergency Visits… Unwanted?

"…Al?" Edward couldn't believe her eyes. Al, her dear brother for which she had spent years and finally restored back to original state, was standing right at her door of her office! She half-walked, half stumbled towards him.

"Al?" she said for a third time, and stopped in front of him.

"…Nii… Nii-san?" Al stared at 'her' in disbelief. But before he could say anything else, or even make the slightest sound of surprise, Edward had flung her arms around him. And that made him even more surprised. The behavior struck him as funny and awkward. What's more, even his "brother's" body felt different. It was like his "brother" had shrunk in size (making in mind not to say it lest it angered "him") and that…

Hey. The arm didn't feel so heavy. It doesn't even feel metal. Why… 'his' chest feels…

Al pulled Edward away from him in surprise. He looked at his 'brother' from top to bottom…

And let out, involuntarily, a gasp. …Edward WAS smaller. Edward had lost the auto-mails too…

And worse of all…

He's got a sister now!

Al stepped back from Edward. From her eyes, he could see tell-tale signs of pain, some suffering and being at a lost. But then she looked down and he could see anymore, though he could feel more emotions pouring off his br… no, his sister.

Sadness. Pain. Anger. Despair. Then…

Surprise and shock. Happiness.

"Nii-san…"

Edward looked at him. At least he still considered her as his brother. She didn't know whether she should be happy or not, but she didn't care. Her dear brother is here! She smiled forlornly, and then gave him another hug.

"…Al…" she said into his chest. "…You're here… …"

There was a long silence as siblings simply held each other, making up for the lost time between them. Then Al began to feel uncomfortable; he was hugging a girl after all, and he just wasn't used to it.

"Nii-san… what happened? It looks like the Co- oops, I mean, the Fuhrer left out a lot of things."

Edward looked up in surprise. Roy? Roy was the one who called him over? To see her? Is that why he didn't come to see her today? Because he knew that Al would come?

"…Ro—umm, the Fuhrer called you over? When was that? How come I didn't know?"

Al smiled in response; Edward's heart lifted. "Yes, he was the one who called. Although…" Al frowned then.

"…What? Is there something else?"

Al let out a sigh. "Winry… she heard me talking over the phone." He looked back at her. "She… Nii-san… She's here too…"

Edward groaned in despair. Winry couldn't choose a better time to come… it was slightly back to troubled times… with… with Envy up to something…

At that thought, Edward's eyes dimmed once more. Al caught that look.

"…Nii-san?"

Edward shook herself and replied, "Nothing, really. Let's go find her. She ran off again, right?"

Al was not too convinced. "You are going to have to tell me all that happened, Nii-san." Then, with shoulders slumped, he continued, "As for Winry… she… well, she actually came here for… for Fuhrer Mustang."

He said it with such hopelessness, but Edward didn't catch that. All she caught was his words, that Winry was here…

For Roy!

She dropped her arms from Al, then walked round him and out the door.

* * *

_Ha. In the car right now. LOL. Actually… I started typing in the car slightly before this. But I only did this now, because I had to shut down. And then now I start up again, and I suddenly remembered. _

_Erm… let's carry on shall we?

* * *

_

There was a break in the meeting, and Roy was now back in his office, pondering over the matter of discussion.

And also of Ed.

He walked up and down the width of his room, pacing. The situation was problematic: there was the problem of the on-going war, where by the Ishvarians were still rebellious against the military. Then there was the threat (very VERY likely from Envy) that a whole city would disappear.

And Ed: had she met Al already? He wondered if Al had soothed her down by now.

* * *

_Back at home. I got tired of typing in the car… And there was the fact that I was getting a bit dizzy. Watching my FMA DVD as I type this. It's the Psiren chapter…_

_Anyway, back to the story. Mine that is. It's been days already! And I'll be going back to school!

* * *

_

Edward was running for the Fuhrer's office. She passed by the members of the meeting; it should have just ended and Roy should be heading back to his room. She didn't bother greeting or acknowledging them, she only had one problem on her mind.

Roy. And that Winry was there.

Edward didn't know why, but there was a strange sensation from the middle of her chest. Her heart. Was it… no. Can't be. She, jealous? Incredulous. Ridiculous.

How could she have forgotten? Winry was smitten by Roy the last time she came (and not forgetting how Al's face seemed to have fallen) to visit them. Roy was the one who brought her in his care after her learning that Scar was the one who killed her parents… (_am I supposed to put this as a spoiler? But I think everyone knows it as well right? Manga wise._) and from then on…

Sure, Roy was handsome and all that… but he and Winry? No way. Not when SHE was now Roy's. And the other way round.

XXX

Roy was now seated at his desk, carelessly signing off papers that required the loopy signature. Once in a while he would cast a look at the huge doors that closed him in this room, hoping that maybe Edward would open them, and walk in to give him company. He wanted somebody around; the signing of papers and the meeting earlier on had totally dulled him. He only wished that anyone would open the door now, be it Hawkeye or Havoc or whoever, so that it can be an excuse to drop the tedious signing for a while. Though of course, if it was Edward, then all the better.

However, the person that came knocking on his door just a minute later was not Edward. Neither was it Hawkeye, Havoc or whoever. Instead…

'_Knock knock.'_

"Yes, just come in, I know who you..." he looked up, and paused, "…EEK! Ms Rockbell!"

Winry, sweeping her hat off her pale blonde hair, beamed at him. Dumping a basket of fruits on top of his work, she walked round the table and actually ((yes, actually)) gave him a hug.

"Good day, Roy! I thought I told you, you can call me Winry you know. 'Ms Rockbell' sounds so stiff." She let him go, and Roy was flabbergasted. She continued, not noticing his look of utter dismay, "I'm so happy; you said you knew who I was? That shows that you've been thinking of me too! Sigh," she wrapped her arms around one of his, "I seriously haven't thanked you enough for what you'd done for me that time."

Roy groaned inwardly. The last time he took care of her was because Ed had asked him to, and at that time 'he' had run off to continue battle with Scar. Words from Winry didn't really register after that; Edward. If Edward were to come in right now, she would…

'_SLAM_'

The doors flew open and Roy stared back at the figure in horror. Winry looked up in surprise.

Edward stood there, taking in Winry hanging off Roy's arm, and promptly strode to the front of the desk.

"…Nii-san! Wait for… oh my." Al came running into the room soon after and saw what Ed saw. His face, Ed noted, fell again, and Edward looked back at Winry with jealously. Yar. It WAS jealously alright.

"…Winry…" Edward gave a low growl, then slowly worked up into a crescendo, "will you please behave yourself and TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF RO— I mean, THE FUHRER!"

Winry let go of Roy, who immediately shifted to one side and stood on Al's left. Edward and Winry were positively staring daggers at each other right now.

"What's your problem? I don't see you saluting at all… or have you forgotten your respect as… OH MY!" Winry looked at Edward more closely, then gave a laugh. Turning to Roy, she asked, "Why, Roy, is this the emergency that you were saying in the phone? That…" she looked back Edward with mirth, "that Edward's…?"

Edward threw a disgusted look at Roy; she was gonna so give it to Roy for making the call to the Rockbell's, which meant that Winry would have gotten wind of it. Then she turned back to Winry, who was staring at Edward, trying not to laugh.

"Yar, I'm a girl, so what? I don't show my respect to _him_," she nodded her head in Roy's direction, "so what? That doesn't give you the right to… to hug Roy!" Then she bit her tongue; she had just used Roy's first name in front of them all.

Winry's eyes widened. "Oh ho, on to first names now, are we? Looks like you are not showing any respect of any kind," she tossed her hair back, "so what have YOU right to tell me to stop what I'm doing?" Winry eyed Edward a little more closely. Then she gave a chuckle.

"…Ah… unless… if I'm not mistaken… OH MY… it should be!" She bent a little to look full into Edward's face (Edward was now definitely shorter than Winry) and spat out, "Somebody's JEA-LOUS."

Edward felt her face redden. "So what! I AM jealous. Will you keep your hands off my Roy now?" Was what she wanted to say.

Instead, she snarled, "SO not! I'm not jealous!" …though knowing that that was so not the truth.

Winry smirked (not as good as Roy's of course; Roy's the master) and pressed her forehead against Edward's, a typical insult, saying softly, "…Oh it's SO obvious, ain't it? You're jelling." She finished and added some pressure on the forehead.

Edward fought back with her own pressure against hers. It was a strength match. "Told you NOT! Leave it!"

"You so are jelling, alchemist geek. Why don't you go back to your room of books?"

"Why don't you leave and go back to your oil and screwdrivers, you mechanic freak?"

"Alchemy dweeb!"

"Mechanical lunatic!"

They kind of broke in to a scuffle; foreheads were past the question now. Al tried to stop them, but was met with a combined bark of, "Stay OUT of it, AL!" and he gave up.

Roy looked at the scuffling duo. Deciding that he should do something before they break anything, he laid a hand on both women and spoke in a very cold voice.

"That's enough, both of you."

Edward's hair was slightly mussed; and Winry's hair faired no better. They both looked up at him and hands stopped in mid-air.

With every inch of authority in his voice, he said severely to them, "Ladies do not fight; neither does this room allow it. Now, my Colonel, I look over the fact that you've forgotten to acknowledge me properly, but Ms Rockbell here is a guest, and I do not allow you to treat her that way. Same goes for you, Ms Rockbell," and Winry's smirking face fell, "Elric here is my Colonel; even though you are not of the Military, a Colonel is still of some rank, so I hope you show some respect."

He straightened, and ordered Al to come over. "Alphonse Elric, please see to it that both you and Ms Rockbell have lodgings at a hotel. I believe that you came straight from the train?"

Al nodded. "Erm, yes, sir. I was wondering which hotel Nii-san was staying at so.."

"..Elric here is currently lodged at my place." Roy interrupted him. Both Al's and Winry's eyes widened. He continued, ignoring both faces, "I would have asked you to do the same, but since Elric is occupying the last vacant room, I'm afraid I cannot allow guests to sleep on the floor or the sofa. The nearest hotel from my place would be Wingdon's; I'll get people to help you." He turned back to Edward.

"Colonel Elric, I expect that you haven't finished your work?" It wasn't even like a question; Edward glared at him, gave a salute, then left the room. Al made as if to follow, but almost didn't until Roy gave him a wave to dismiss him, adding, "You go with her; I'll send Winry to let you know that your lodgings are complete."

Al walked out trying to catch up with the back of Edward. And leaving Winry alone with Roy back in the office. When he reached his 'brother's' office, Edward was now signing her paperwork with anger, vehemently muttering all the while (Al need not guess; Edward tended to swear a lot).

He sat on the sofa's in his 'brother's office and waited until the mutterings ceased. Now Edward merely looked disgruntled with what had happened, though there was a slight hint of anger in her eyes.

Al gave a sigh; plucking the courage, he turned to face Edward.

"Nii-san…"

"What?" Her response was short and indifferent.

"Nii-san, you want to talk about it? You have to tell me everything that happened you know."

Edward placed the pen down; she walked round her desk and threw herself onto the sofa beside Al.

"I don't know whether to tell or not. I'm in two minds. Recently, I've been in two minds in just about everything."

Al looked at Edward. Having both studied before, he knew this was the cause of hormones; since Edward was now a girl, her hormones would likely have been changed… Her mindset would ALSO have changed…

"…Care to share, Nii-san?"

Edward looked at her brother. Then she sighed, and leaned back onto the sofa.

"…It's gonna be long…"

* * *

_Yay! I finally finished this chapter! I know; I actually dragged it out for a few days, and it's done! Ah… peace._

_Though I'm afraid I won't be updating so frequently after this. I'm gonna die! Know why? My new timetable is terrible. It truly sucks. Why, on Mondays, I have school from 11am all the way to 9pm. No breaks except for lunch and dinner. Boo hoo! Then on other days I have no breaks in between at all! Sigh. No more luxury of going out during those free times. _

_So till' the next time then! I feel like saying something; I have something to say but it slipped my mind… seemed pretty urgent. Never mind, maybe next time. Byez!_


End file.
